Have you ever been reminded of a sort of dream you once had, and then wondered if it might still be a dream of yours? Tonight, participating in something I haven’t done in a while, and in a slightly new way, I was reminded briefly of a dream I once had relating to it all. I wanted it so badly, it hurt not pursuing it back then… and I pursued it somewhat, when finances allowed for it. But, eventually, something happened, and I stepped away. Ever since then, I’ve been kind of tentative being involved at all…, yet I saw tonight that that dream might still be within me. And something has me terrified of it in a bad way, while part of me feels entirely comfortable and at ease with it, kind of like a, ‘Well, of course I’ll do that. Easy.’
My stomach is quaky with caffeine right now, unfortunately, so I’ll have to see how I feel in the morning and tomorrow. Is the quaking just the caffeine, or is it more? (I’ve got my fingers crossed (and terrified about it) for it being just the caffeine.) We’ll see. Perhaps I won’t even remember it tomorrow. That might be the determining factor, actually. I really might not remember tomorrow, it is of so little real importance to me, this disregarded dream I once had.