It’s really hard to want to give up. Even for something I have wanted for so long. The long suffering of not having it was its own sort of torture, sure, but it was a very doable torture for me. Being so terribly nauseous and bloated all the time and for so long now – it’s been a month of literally constant nausea – has worn me down badly today. Very badly.
I find myself considering not wanting to do it anymore; giving it up just so I don’t have to be sick anymore. And that feels terrible. I am so sad and disappointed that I am even having these thoughts, especially after having made it past the worst of the nausea. I’m still miserable and nauseous all the time, burnt isn’t as bad as it was even a week ago, let alone two weeks ago. And yet, it persists, and I am wearing thin.
God, help me, please. Allow me to trust you completely. Heal me of this nausea and help me to grow this baby well and perfectly without the nausea. Please. I don’t feel like I can do this anymore, and I am so ashamed of how I feel – heal me of this, too, please. All is possible through you. Keep my husband safe, please. Help me to sleep well and keep the baby safe, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.
Post-a-day 2024
hannah ananas 