I want to say little on this topic; I want merely to address it with a statement:
There is extreme value in answering the question that is asked, as well as in asking the question one wants to be answered.
I do my best to do both, and to say what I mean and to mean what I say. People often find me to be rude and blunt.
Have you ever gone through with things that scared you, but that you knew were merely all potential outlets for your own greatness (that being the main reason that they scared you in the first place)? And have you ever had them all line up in a row for you, showing you the extreme degree of possibility that you have developed for yourself in pursuing them? And were you terrified, yet simultaneously proud, when you saw them so lined up in front of you?
And then, from somewhere in the background, did you grow just a little sad that this was the first time you’d done something like this, because you suddenly saw how much more you could have been doing for yourself and your own potential, starting long, long ago?
Yeah… that is tonight for me.
It is amazing to me how, back in the time of Jeanne d’Arc, it was astonishing that she could do what she did, and especially so, – and this is the biggest part – because she was a girl, and not a man.
Rather, it is amazing to me that such a thing was seen as utterly spectacular back then, in the 1400s, and yet society still has not altered to accept such accomplishments from females.
It kind of makes me wonder what kind of accomplishments would alter society’s view of women, if such acts as those of Jeanne d’Arc fell as a mere anomaly, – even the smallest matter of her dressing in trousers or armor, or being a member of an army, let alone leading it – something that could never otherwise be expected.
I have been in a state of near-panic most of the day and evening today and this evening, because fleas appeared last night in the room where I have been staying, and have transitioned from only seven last night to over fifty grabbed today, and a whole section – call it a herd, if you will, because I do – of them discovered just tonight.
Suffice to say that I am anxty, nervous, and I feel like I might break down in tears at the slightest additional provocation.
God, heal this space and me as I sleep tonight.
“Ah, well, have your way if you must. But he that fasts must attempt but little and stop early. When shall you be back?”
A God-loving man once said that to Jeanne d’Arc (in French, of course), when she denied breakfast, because she was in such an excited and exhilarated hurry to get to the day’s task (of reclaiming the rest of the the river).
Sonething about it just struck me very strongly, and gave me an experience of delight. I suppose it was the fact that it was someone who was Catholic giving such an idea, making it an odd sort of contradiction to modern practice in the religion.
I asked someone if she likes kolaches, and she responded, “What is that?”
After a brief moment of being unable to breathe, I experienced a feeling of pure gratitude for having grown up in Texas.Post-a-day 2018
Sometimes, I find myself looking for inspiration, for a muse in my life.
And then, I remember the shower, a place where any and all problems find their solutions (and many options for them, at that).
Dear God, thank you for western showers. I really appreciate and value them, for more reasons than a few. 🙂
Sometimes, I think I might have too much to do in a day, but then I remember that I really don’t have a set space to work or a set routine for almost any given day.
Sometimes, life is just exhausting, – especially when doing it well – and we need to relax.
Sometimes, it feels like either everything or nothing comes my way. For quite some time, I have had a lot of nothing seeking me out, but I always had this feeling about how, ‘In June, I will know.’ I don’t know where I got the idea and phrase – call it divine inspiration, if you will – but it just came to me one day as an answering thought to my wondering about what my next step in life and work will be. As though in a conversation, when one person responds to another’s question or concern, the thought appeared in my mind.
And so, I have put forth my efforts in what I have been doing, as well as stayed open-minded for what could be next for me. Now, here I am, so close to June, and it looks like I have a whole handful of solid possibilities for what might be next in my life. I hadn’t even realized how close to June it is, when I realized today how crazy it is, that I suddenly have what feels like a hundred opportunities knocking at my door.
Just as I had done earlier in the year, I will persist in pursuing these beautiful ideas and options that have come my way. In doing so, perhaps, in June I will know which one or ones are part of my next semester in life.