Juice Cleanse

“How are you feeling today?
I’m feeling dreadful. My stomach hurts, I off and on feel like I might vomit, and my body is miserable.
Talk about detox.”

We have been eating loads of junk we don’t usually eat, mostly because of the season – candy (Halloween), pumpkin pie (Fall), eggnog (almost Winter), pizza (because we get it at Costco, where we get the pumpkin pie), and chocolate milk (because we’re already drinking the eggnog, which is dairy!). So, we determined that a juice cleanse was in order. And we started it today. And I have never had such a struggle with a juice cleanse in my life as I had today. Goodness, I felt dreadful. And I also was freezing all day long… and I might have actually had a fever… :/ Like I said, it was rough today.

Post-a-day 2022

Massages

Every time I get a massage, I feel ill afterward. And I mean truly ill, like I need to have some chicken soup and down some water and sleep for 24-48 hours. Not every time is quite so bad, but it seems to be consistent with how long the massage is, as to how intense the illness feeling becomes.

My mom, who is a massage therapist, says it is completely normal, though. She says that so much is being activated and moved around in the body, it is having to let go of a bunch of germs and other junk that had been hanging out in it. So, it’s completely normal to feel sick, because all those nodes and everything are, in a way, being beaten up for a while, and the body needs some recovery time, some rest, and a lot of water.

So, I’ll have me some more water now and get to bed, because I have school in the morning!

Post-a-day 2022

Prayers for Jane’s Healing

Whatever your method, whatever your beliefs, however you can, I ask for your prayers, your intentions, your positive energy, your love, your light to guide healing and release to our dearest friend Jane. Her body needs some help right now especially, and I ask for your support, wherever you are, whenever you are. However you call the cosmic energy that connects us all, please, ask it if it would grant Jane those healing atoms and neurons and electrons and cells, please. Your support will be forever appreciated.

God, please, grant this healing of Jane’s physical body and the release of strain that she has been holding as of late. Allow her to offer her cross up to you, that you might lift the load and heal her in her time of such dependent need. Help her to be her best self, and to be it here with us all, on Earth, and for many years to come. In your name, we pray. Amen.

St. Jude and Mary, Mother of God, pray for us, please, and pray for Jane’s healing. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Ouch

“You oughta see yourself,” she says, chuckling. “You look like…,” and she makes motions with her arms that are very clearly imitating a monkey.

Oh, I know, Grandma… I am incredibly aware… 😛

After the workout yesterday – mile run, 100 pull-ups (modified to difficult ring rows), 200 push-ups (modified to dumbbell push-ups for my wrist), 300 air squats, and another mile run, both runs with a 10lb weight vest on me – my arms are in big time muscle soreness. I hadn’t done push-ups in months because of my wrist, and I suddenly shot out 200 of them. It’s no wonder they hurt today, but boy, do they hurt! I actually woke up in the middle of the night last night, they were hurting so badly. I was rubbing and stretching half the night after that. Then, today, I couldn’t quite get my arms to bend normally, so, every time I itched my face or wiped my mouth or brushed back a lock of hair, my overly rounded arm shape made me look and feel just like a monkey.

Fortunately, all the vitamins and food and water and stretching and low-grade use of those muscles today has helped significantly. They aren’t healed fully, but they are much better than this time last night!

God, thank you for the blessing of this pain, this reminder always to take care of myself and be grateful for my body and its capabilities. Please, help me to heal fully that I might pursue fully and fulfill your will. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Wait, weight

Two things here. Firstly, language, and secondly, looks.

Language: I find it important to be conscious of what language we use around everything in life. This includes body weight and fitness. So, I do not like to use the term ‘to lose weight’ or any form of it. Why? Because, like they say with hypnosis and all other subconscious-connected things, if we “lose something,” our brains will aim to “get it back.” So, if we say that we’ve lost weight, our brains subconsciously can be always on the lookout to find that lost weight. It may sound utterly ridiculous, but the ways in which our words can impact our thinking, our habits, and our lives is quite profound.

So, I say things like, “released,” “went down in,” “got rid of,” etc. weight or fat, or I just say that one “weighs less,” instead did that someone “lost weight.”

Now, that being said, I move to the second item on the agenda.

Looks: Have you ever seen or known someone who actually looks like he or she lost weight? Like it is actually missing from their bodies, and they look, somehow, incomplete without it? Like they need to fill out, and presently look shrunken and somewhat collapsed and odd in their own skin? Some people seem like they are actually made to be a bit thicker, tougher, more solid, and so they look odd – like they’re missing something – once they have lost their weight…, because it seems it really was lost somewhere and ought to be found.

Post-a-day 2022

Rest in the knowledge

‘I mean, I love him, but if he’s not going to take his fitness seriously, then it’s not ever gonna happen,’ she says with casual comfort and clear honesty. ‘If he won’t even stretch, then no way…’ She is not upset in what she says, nor is she concerned. For her, it is clear that, if he isn’t the one, then he just isn’t the one, and she’s totally okay not spending any strain, stress, or brainpower on wishing, hoping, or dreaming for him to be the one. If he’s not, he’s not, and there’s someone better out there. If he is, then he’ll make it clear that he is, which will include caring about his well-being and honoring his own body. How can we love another, if we cannot love ourselves?

Be not afraid. God is with us, even and especially when we feel so utterly alone on the partner/relationship front. God, grant me the serenity to be your love in the world, even and especially in the face of no agreement in my life. Help me to do what only I can do to share your love in the world. Help me to fulfill on all I am capable of doing in this life, through your will and help. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Still have to think about that year…)

Bombshell, or just an actual bomb?

Whenever I see those gorgeously fit people – the ones who are basically the epitome of what we’re meant to do with the human body – I find myself just a little bit tense, stressed, on their behalves. I place upon them this ideal, somehow. Since they are practically perfect in this one visible right, they must be perfect in all the other rights, too. Their lives must be in order. They all must have a gorgeously fit partner or spouse, too, and an amazing house and car and job, and, basically, their lives are perfect. Right?
Except, I know their lives aren’t perfect. I know it is just an automatic judgment my brain makes, and that it likely isn’t the truth.
However, I always have found myself envying and, sometimes, slightly disliking these people for that envy, as though it were jealousy (that I can’t have something because someone else has it), even though their fitness has nothing to do with my own.
Now, that all being said, I must say: I believe I have become one of these people. No, I am not in the top tier of them, but I am definitely part of these incredibly fit individuals.
Yes, I am extremely grateful for this, for my intense efforts paying off so well. However, I also have found a certain degree of unexpected stress from my fitness. You see, now when I show up somewhere that is not the gym in anything that shows off my body or fitness, I feel almost weird. I almost feel like I need to hide myself, so as not to upset those around me who are so clearly not on the same level in terms of physical fitness. It isn’t always, but I sometimes see the looks people give me, and I can see that envy, the misplaced jealousy… even, at times, hatred. And these things hurt.
Part of me feels that it would be so much easier just to hide, just to allow the loud voices demanding inclusiveness and equality their way… and yet, where is the love there? When I am hiding myself in shame, in fear… what I have worked so hard towards having… When I am rejected for who I am… where is the love there?
I keep returning to Marianne Williamson’s quote about how my playing small does not serve the world… My hiding does not help… anyone, especially myself. I am here to love and to teach int this life. I am not here to cower. Hiding away or being ashamed of who I am is not honoring myself, my work, or God. I am God’s gift and an expression of His creativity in the world. When I am honoring myself and being my best self, I am honoring God. When I am ashamed of myself and hiding myself, so, too, am I doing that to God…
I understand all of what I have said here. I am convinced that it does not work for me to hide away or feel ashamed for my fitness and my fitness goals and pursuits. Yet, I still feel such pressure at being seen as ‘one of those fit people’.
Why?
I think it is because, to me, being rejected by others has been quite difficult in my life. I have had some very hard rejections from people in my life, on various levels. Oftentimes, they never even told me why I was being rejected, which made it even worse. Now, being rejected for my fitness isn’t about the fitness for me, but about its being yet another rejection.
Yes, that is exactly it. (I can tell, because that is what brought tears to my eyes just now.)
Okay, so, as my silly unicorn calendar said last year, I must remember that, whenever someone rejects me, The Universe is also protecting me from that person. For whatever reason, that person is not needed in my life beyond simply exiting it.
So, the people at my one job might not like me very much. But that isn’t because they know me. It is because they don’t know me. And because they weren’t willing to get to know me. If that is the case, then they aren’t people for my life in the long-run. It’s as simple as that. I want people in my life who both can and will love me. If they won’t get to know me, they never can love me. If I am hiding away myself, then those people still won’t get to know me and still won’t be able to love me. Therefore, be myself truly. If people reject me for that, it is for their own problems and struggles – it has almost nothing to do with me and everything to do with what my presence brings up from their memories about themselves. Being small serves No One and none. Indeed. Again as Marianne Williamson says, being true to myself and letting my own light shine will allow others to do the same for themselves. Though I likely will upset the loud few for being so gorgeously fit and for sharing that fitness with the world around me, the ones who are ready will take the opportunity as – consciously or not – inspiration for their own pursuits.
Therefore, honoring myself with my fitness, sharing it openly, also will be honoring and supporting those around me.
That’s quite cool, actually…
Post-a-day 2022

Struggle day

I didn’t eat well and properly today, nor did I drink enough water, nor did I put together and take my supplements. (The supplements have been since Tuesday, which is quite a bad idea for me. So, I must put them together tomorrow and start taking them consistently again.) My head has been hurting a while now, and I feel kind of dreadful from it all. I napped midday for a few hours, though it was somewhat stressful sleep, in and out. Now, I am going to bed later than I had wanted, but this was, somehow, what I needed for today. God, please bless my sleep and my body that I awake rested and well tomorrow, ready and able to take on the day you have granted to me, that I might be your love in the world as I step forward into it all and embody your love and creativity through all that is this expression of me in this life. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Barely got it!)

My Body

My body is extremely sore,
Worn out,
Ground,
Grounded.
But it is also satisfied,
Sated,
Lifted,
And elated,
For it comes from a week
Of releasing what is weak,
Embracing my state
and pursuing my strength,
Letting go of what’s in the way
Of being my best
And fittest
Self.
This week was great
In a really hard way.
Indeed,
I will pass out hard
After a week so hard,
And I will relish
The restoration
Tonight’s and tomorrow’s rest
Will bring.
And I will breathe
Easily,
Freely,
And with increased oxygen.
And,
Next week,
I’ll do it again.

Post-a-day 2022
(Still got it wrong…)