Another some days

Some days, we have high plans, but then end up sleeping most of the day. And that’s totally okay. It is important that we allow our bodies to rest when they need the rest. Aside from all the general rejuvenation that sleep gives us, it is also the time that our muscles repair and build and that our outgoing fat gets released. So, sleep is even better than we imagined!

That being said, I accomplished minor but important tasks today, and I did not accomplish several intended tasks for the day. And that is perfect and okay. I am now going to bed rather early, and that, too, is perfect and okay.

Thank you, World, for this beautiful day and life. I look forward with gratitude to whomever and whatever it is that may come still. 🤗🙏🐪

Post-a-day 2021

^Remembered again partway through!

The hard conversations

I talked openly about sexual abuse with someone yesterday. And about body parts. And sexual intercourse.

There was no anger or wrong-making or freaking out. We just talked. Questions were asked and answered calmly, honestly, and genuinely. And the conversation eventually comfortably and naturally moved onward into something else.

And nothing was weird. And we both gained an unexpected degree of value from the conversation.

And wouldn’t the world be a better place, if we could have informative, open, and safe conversations about more of these traditionally taboo and sensitive topics?

My world certainly has improved since they have become part of my everyday life. It was really, really scary at first, and difficult. And awkward and uncomfortable. Now, though, it has become quite normal and easy. And I am grateful for that every time such an opportunity and conversation arise.

Post-a-day 2021

^Right in the middle of typing it, I caught myself, and so got it right 😛

Ready or not

My whole body seems to be hurting – well, all the muscles on the outer layers, anyway – right now, it is almost 11 o’clock, and yet I am getting up at 4:20am to attend the 5:15 workout class in the morning. And I have several activities scheduled with others throughout most of the day tomorrow. I likely will be very tired and sleepy by the end of it all.

So, why I am sticking to all of it, instead of rearranging or rescheduling anything? Because tomorrow is one version of an ideal day for me. I will be doing things that nourish me, that nourish others, that I love doing, and that also happen to earn quality money to support me in this life.

And I am not only super excited about it – I am terrified. It’s that good. 🙂

So, cheers to a restful and empowering sleep for me tonight, and for anyone else who needs it tonight: may we have our dreams come to fruition, as we become our true selves more and more every day. 😉

Post-a-day 2021

^ Whoop! Had to think about it, but I got it right!

Brain fart?

I just received a box in the mail. I was surprised, as I was not expecting any boxes. It was a 12”x10”x6” box.

Its contents?

A piece of paper and a plastic package of underwear, measuring 4”x3”x1”.

And I know the sender had significantly more environmentally friendly and less wasteful packaging available to them. In fact, their usual packaging is quite small, and is reusable.

Is that not just ridiculous?

Perhaps the box is a better deal, because I will recycle it, but I might not ever reuse the reusable packaging they typically use. N

onetheless, why?

Note: And yes, I would have bought the underwear in person, had they been available for me to buy anywhere in person.

Post-a-day 2021

^ 100% missed it this time. I actually forgot that I had even written anything at the end, and was going back to add the line before publishing, when I found that I had already done it… with 2020… ::face palm

Steps, my a…

Why, oh, why did I have to be resting in bed all day today? I know I was sick with a cold, and my body needed the rest and recuperation. I know that. But why did it have to be an all day thing?

Because now I have to compensate 7,000+ steps that were intended to be spread throughout the day. As I prepared for bed just now, I found an unfortunate approximate 2500 steps achieved for the day. Which, I suppose, is a lot for a day of being sick in bed almost the whole day, never leaving the house, and not officially being up and about until after 1pm.

Nonetheless, I genuinely forgot about it today. My rest was necessary, I know, but I very easily could have done some extra walking around the house later in the afternoon and evening, as I was feeling progressively better. Instead, totally sleepy and ready for bed, I’m having to get the remaining approximate 7500 steps required for me to go to bed.

Man, does it sometimes suck sticking to one’s own word…

And I want to go to bed so badly, because I’m getting up at 4:20 in the morning to go do a super intense workout, which will burn loads more calories than these 7500 steps right now will burn. So, that just adds to the annoyance of this all.

But I set this goal and requirement for myself, fully knowing myself. I gave my word. And I always am grateful afterward that I stuck to my word, even when it is under ridiculous circumstances.

So, yeah… ::face palm

Post-a-day 2021

^Whew!

Winterrr

Well, it is full-on brrr time in Houston right now. We were at 3°C this morning, with a feels like of -1. I had a frosty windshield when I got up to go exercise this morning, evidenced here:

By midday, however, the chill had fully gotten to me: my throat was hurting. By early afternoon, I could hear buildup in the back of my nose, and my voice was difficult to use at regular volume, and sounded odd, like going in and out of signal somehow. I took a long nap early afternoon, had an extra super-smoothie, then ate hot food for dinner. And I am definitely sick.

However, it feels just like all the other winter chills I seem to get at least once every year. Hopefully, I can sleep and drink it off* this weekend, and be back to fully functioning by Monday morning. My dad and I are scheduled to go for a walk together for his birthday then. (Clearly, I won’t be preparing a song for him this weekend, seeing as how singing is not really an option for me at the moment.)

Anyway, here’s to hoping my room is warm enough tonight to help heal me properly, and my sleep is deep enough and lasts long enough to help, as well. Cheers!

*Of course, I mean with water. I hope you didn’t need that clarification, though. 😛

Post-a-day 2021

^Got it, but only barely, like last night!

Say, what?!!?

Have you ever had that moment when something on your actual life sounds like something from a film? Where you have a moment of being unsure as to whether you will break into tears at the stress of it all, or you will break into laughter at how ridiculous and movie-like it all is…or, maybe, both?

I had one of those today: a genuine, ‘What… the…,’ mind-shocking unraveling of events. And I still don’t know what to make of it all.

The problems are just like in the films, with, I am almost certain, the exact same reasons for having developed as the film-problems have. And I don’t know if they are going to be solved, or just used as sad memories for those involved for years to come. Will righteousness and hurt, anger, frustration, and a lack of true and genuine communication reign, ruining the opportunity for intense, immense love? Or will those involved stop and breathe and acknowledge the love they have and want to share, and straighten out their words and needs and means of communications, and truly – possibly for the first time ever – and fully create the love they want to share?

I prefer the latter, without a moment’s hesitation or doubt.

Fingers crossed!

Post-a-day 2021

^Almost there! Still got it wrong at first, but corrected it immediately, with a little sigh, of course. ;P

Scary, scary

I have been working on actively taking on doing things that scare me. On Sunday, I went running on my own at a park that people use for running all the time. It was terrifying, and thrilling. And I actually want to go back. It makes sense to me now, why people might run there versus at home. I’m sick of running through my neighborhood, I’ve done it so much. This made for a change of scenery with reliable measurements and safety. Also, it provided support and encouragement via everyone else there getting in a run and/or walk in their mornings.

On Monday and Tuesday, I also did something each day, but I’m not recalling what at present… I actually am not even remembering almost anything I did on either day right now… lunch with my dad was… yesterday? Yes, yesterday. I worked Monday. Yeah, and I even wrote all about my day yesterday… I guess I’m tired now and ready for bedtime. Haha 😛 Anyway, moving onward…

Today, I asked for something that was due to me. The answer was an easy and immediate, “Yeah, of course!” from the person. Wow! That was easy and had an awesome result. I also went to the post office and handled all my mailings that needed to go out…. months ago, really. But they are now done! Yay! Huge relief there. Yay!

Tomorrow, it will be something else. And the same is the goal for each day after that. I took on this idea at one point in college, and I ended up having a blast with the things I did. Life had a new and spectacular edge to it. I still remember specifically how I ended up skateboarding behind the administration building as one of those things – I really wanted to try it, but was scared… and so I made it my thing for that day, and let the guy teach me how to do it. It was thrilling and frightening, and I am still grateful that I did it.

One of the scariest things for me is speaking up, be it standing up for myself or just asking for something, making a request, speaking up can be quite difficult for me to do. So, I expect a good handful of these scary things will involve speaking up. For the first while, anyway. Perhaps I will adjust so well to having to speak up so often as my scary thing for the day, that it won’t be scary anymore. That could be fun. It would open up a whole new world of scary things to pursue.

(Keep in mind, these are not dangerous things. They are merely regular things that, due to fear, I typically would avoid doing, despite wishing I could or would do them.)

Post-a-day 2021

^Man, I just got it wrong this time. I had closed the post, when I wondered if I had even put the last line on it. I wasn’t even thinking about if I’d gotten the year correct. When I saw it, I was surprised and relieved that I’d written it. And then, as I was scrolling away to close it, I remembered to check for the correct year. And it was 2020. ::mega face palm tonight Haha

An unexpected day of… casual chaos?

Okay, so the song-writing got held off until tomorrow. That’s okay. I had a lovely day nonetheless, filled with all sorts of oddities that turned out to be just fine in the end.

My lunch with my dad got all messed up, and we didn’t go to any of the places we were considering, and it wasn’t just the two of us. We didn’t talk about almost any of what we would have discussed as just the two of us. I didn’t get the amazing seasonal meal I had been anticipating. And we still enjoyed having lunch together and talking on he phone a bit afterward, and I enjoyed my dish, despite its having not been strictly with my diet (diet as in ‘regime,’ not as in ‘on a diet’). It was brisket and barbecue sauce with fresh purple cabbage on a baked sweet potato. Baller, though the sauce was a bit too sweet for my taste. That would be the sugar.

Then I was supposed to pick up something from my mom. She got distracted on her way in to work, and so wasn’t there. I waited around half an hour, but had no word in response from her, so continued on to Costco to buy groceries. (Yes, I get my fruits and veggies from Costco usually, because I go through them so quickly, preparing most of my food and beverage at home all the time. Today, I was mostly getting frozen fruits and fresh greens to use for smoothies. Yumm!) Turns out that my mom actually forgot her phone at home today, but she called me when she had arrived at the office, in order to let me know that I could come meet her now.

In my morning research today, I had found that Walmart would print passport photos, if we submit them online. Through doing my morning research, I didn’t put together my new shelving unit from Ikea, as had been the plan. But I had found a much more affordable way to get my passport photos than by going to CVS or Walgreens, and was grateful for that.

I was going to have my friend photo me when she came for the songwriting, and then was going to have my dad do it instead at lunch. Then that fell through, and I figured my mom could do it when we met up (because my friend had canceled at this point). But that was not too likely, since I couldn’t reach my mom at all now.

What to do? What to do?

When entering Costco, I glanced to the photo department – I had been surprised that they didn’t have passport photos as an option online during my research, so wanted to verify casually – and saw a massive sign reading, “Passport Photos”. I did an about-face, walked up to the photo counter and asked if they did passport photos (because doing them is different from just printing them, mind you). She said, “Yeah! I’ll just meet you down at the end past the last counter. There’s a white screen there.”

Okay, great! Thanks!

I ditched my jacket, used a mirror, fixed my hair and scarf – which was surprisingly little effort, actually – and posed happily for a photo. And then another, because I didn’t love it.

The second photo I accepted, acknowledging that it did look as I look – it was true to me as a representation – and then went about my fruit and veggie shopping before picking up the four photos for less than even the Walmart price had been(!!!), and then heading back to the office to meet my mom (she had called me at this point).

I had a lovely visit on top of the little parking area with her, then headed home to find the same old lady with the same old little dog crapping in the yard as was crapping in the yard when I had left earlier for lunch.

I unpacked, organized the freezer stuff, finished a pumpkin pie smoothie from yesterday (It was heavy and intense, like drinking pie, really.), did a double handful of deadlifts as I passed the barbell, did a load of laundry, tutored out of nowhere, worked on and shared photos I recently did, made another smoothie, listened to Matthew McConaughey read more of his book, showered, and then put together the shelving unit.

Now, I am about to pass out with exhaustion in my eyes and back and neck, ready to get up early for the workout class. I even reached out to my workout buddy friend this morning to verify that he’d be st class in the morning. I can’t get up and attend a 5:15am class without him, now! 😛

So, the day went nothing as anticipated, but I still accomplished almost everything that I had intended, plus much more. By doing the shelving unit, I ended up with a good surface space to do my kakizome tomorrow. So, though I didn’t do the kakizome today, I not have a better space and more of the right kind of paper for practice (it was between the shelves in the box!)!

Before I further my rambling, I bid you all a lovely, rest-filled night!

Post-a-day 2021

^I almost got it wrong, but I caught myself just before typing it out!

Dance, if you wanna

One of the most upsetting things in our society right now for me – one of the day-to-day things that really bugs me and kind of breaks my heart – is how much gender is used as a restrictor by so much of society.

I mentioned how I thought my nephew really would love learning and doing ballet and other dances, and I was met with a passive laugh and a certain, somewhat snarky comment to say that it never would happen, but what a cute idea. I was gobsmacked. The person didn’t even think I was saying it because I meant it. She actually thought I was just saying it passively, as opposed to my sharing something I genuinely believed and had hopes could happen.

Granted, my sister has very much played the gender toys game for her kids – pink and purses and baby-dolls are for girls, and blues and trucks and superheroes are for boys. However, dance is something amazing for any and all people to do, especially athletes. My sister is an athlete, and she can understand that benefit of dance especially. I think she might be willing to consider the idea of dance for my nephew, if it were presented appropriately and he showed interest in it openly.

Even that, though, has its own degree of upset and disappointment for me: that it has to be presented appropriately. I don’t just mean showing that dance is awesome, but showing that dance is so awesome that it is okay for both genders. Because I know, that likely would be part of it for her.

If I ever have children, no matter the gender of each and every, they all will do karate and dance and volleyball and all the fun, beautiful, beneficial stuff out there that we can find and/or create for them to do. Gender will have no value in the matter. It merely will determine which bathroom they use while at the activity.

Post-a-day 2021

^ Wrote that wrong at first again, but caught myself before submitting! Happy 2021, folks!