First Impressions

‘I didn’t really like [———] at first.’

‘I didn’t either… She was very much a ‘CrossFit You got this!’ coach as her first impression… Maybe she’s just really shy.’

‘Maybe.’

‘I really like her now, though. She’s really cool.’

‘Yeah. I like her, too.’

The casual conversation during an absolutely terrible movie that I forgot wasn’t actually a Hallmark Christmas movie, but a NETFLIX(!!!) one… 1) That movie was shockingly terrible in all respects, despite the premise being cute. 2) I wonder how often a shy person in a setting that requires extroverted interactions gets a bad rap, when, really, everyone actually would love the person, given a different initial setting.

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P.S. “The Noel Diary”… I’ve warned you. Enjoy! 😛

Helpless

Sometimes, I think it is important that we feel the experience of being helpless. Because, sometimes, there is no other way to make the lesson stick than for us to end up in a scenario where we feel utterly helpless, and at our own hands.

Thank you, God, for this opportunity. Please, help me to grow beautifully from it. Amen.

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Thanksgiving Day, right?

1. The Turkey Trot was awesome. It was cool and misting the whole time to varying degrees, I ran my second-fastest 5k despite the crazy elevation changes throughout the trail run, I got fifth in my age group (25-50!) and tenth in women and 38th overall, my man got fourth in his age group and 20th in men and 24th overall, and my mom got eighth in her age group (50+) and 72nd in women and 157th overall (she did a walk-run for the whole thing, whereas we ran for times).

Oddly, at the finish, they had bananas and granola bars and waters… and homemade spring rolls. 😛

2. My mom made us a tasty ad warm brunch afterward.

3. We had a good time saying bye to my Grandma. She was very good at charming the dog this week, as you can see…

4. We finally get home tonight, and I’ve been waiting for a nice and hot shower before bed in my comfy and cozy bed with my awesome new pillow… and the gas line has a leak in the backyard… meaning we have no heat in the house, no hot water, and no stove to make hot water. Fortunately, I had an electric kettle, so I pulled it out and heated two pitchers, poured them into a big pot, and took the pot and a coffee mug to the shower with me. I cried most of the shower, but scooping out some hot water with the mug, then adding cold water from the shower to it and pouring it over parts of my body helped me wash myself better. And I filled the whole pot with extra cold water at the end, and I dumped the whole thing over my head (and, therefore, body) after turning off the freezing shower head. So, it was rough, in a ridiculous way, but it ended decently. My feet have almost stopped hurting from all the cold.

Anyway, bedtime has long since passed. Goodnight!

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Giving Thanks

My body has finally relaxed enough for me not to be somewhat miserable anymore this evening. Thank you, God. And thank you for the family with whom I have been blessed to spend time this week, both during my physical pains and afterward. Please, keep us safe at our Turkey Trot 5k run tomorrow morning, as well as on our drives home. Help us always to pursue your will and to be your love. In your name, I pray. Amen.

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Challenges

Perhaps the Universe is just always ready with the next challenge, demanding and standing for our own improvement, our own development into the people we not only can be but were made to be.

…….

Well, we made it. And it was rough when we first arrived… That’s for sure. It took a lot for my man and me to stay present to what was needed versus what was freaking us out and stressing us and all the negative and not-helpful stuff of the situation. We’re staying in an AirBnB, and, put simply, it was not clean when we arrived. And it kept getting worse, the more we ventured into more of the house. As a reminder, I have OCD, making dirty particularly difficult for me. Separately, I care about justice and integrity – charging $405 a night (which also happens to be $100 more than most dates for this place) for a man older place with three bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a loft seems to me to be a price that would include cleanliness of the space. Period. So, we had a lot with which we had to deal for all of that. My man had to miss the lunch for my grandma’s birthday, but he still came and said hi to her at the start, before going back to the place to meet the cleaner. (Suffice it to say that the place has now been cleaned, and there was just a massive failure on the owner/manager’s part of not verifying that it was ever cleaned, despite having hired someone to do so.)

All that to say that life really does demand we become better versions of ourselves, whether we like it or not. Today has been one of those days for me. And, unfortunately, I’m also feeling sick in the throat… :/

Dear God, please, heal me with this rest I am allowing for myself tonight (in bed before nine!). Grant me beautiful health and well-being this week, that I might spend the week lovingly with my beloved family, your blessings to me. In your name and with gratitude, I pray. Amen.

P.S. Oh, and, to top it all off, I started menstruating almost a week earlier than expected today. Talk about having to gtf over it and make it work. This has been a day, for sure!

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Body

Still not feeling great tonight. I slept around eight and a half hours last night, before the squirrels woke me*. I awoke feeling much improved, but it still wasn’t enough. I had soup today, and other healthy food, with only a few bites of not-super-healthy stuff. I exercised at midday, then attempted my 1.5-mile run for the karate test this Saturday, which I failed. It had to be under 13 minutes, and I did it in 13:15, and felt like I might actually throw up the cheese stick I’d just eaten. It was so cold when I started, I felt I’d get such without and outer layer of good warmth. That flannel shirt and scarf and gloves proved to be my downfall (on top of the cheese, that is), making me too hot with it on normally, and then being heavy and still-hot when I’d taken them off and just tied them around my waist. I was also still tired as a whole, but extra worn down from the workout at midday (which, by the way, was practically the Murph workout, with a mile run, 100 pull-ups, 200 push-ups, 300 air squats, and another mile run. We only did 800m runs, instead of the mile on each end, but we added a 400m in the middle, and split the three movements in half on either side of it, doing 50 pull-ups, 100 push-ups, and 150 air squats twice, once on either side of the 400m run. Not an easy workout, even with modifications.). So, it makes sense. I’ll just do it again tomorrow, but normally and much better than today’s run. I don’t typically feel like vomiting when I run, yet I felt that way most of the run this afternoon, and I just felt heavy.

And, tonight, I still feel a bit sick. I was coughing up the occasional bits of icky bogey-like saliva earlier, which supports the ill feelings. So, at that, I go to sleep now. Thank you, and goodnight.

* You see, we have this wooden picnic table squirrel feeder that my man keeps moving around. The past couple days, it has happened to be atop this metal shelf thing outside. So, of course, as the squirrels climb the thing, the bars all jiggle against one another, making the sound of metal pipes bumping each other. Then, once the guys are on top, they then messily spill corn etc. all onto the metal shelf thing, and the lands not just the once on top, but regularly tumbles down to the bottom level or the ground, tinkling all the way on the metal… over and over and over again. Not the greatest to have next to one’s window at six in the morning, I tell you.

10k

Do our run, get an event shirt that’s retail value is only one dollar less than your entry fee. Eat some bananas and RX Bars and churros after the finish line. Do our free yoga class afterward to stretch yourself out, and take the $88 mat you used home for free.

Not bad, lululemon. Not bad at all for your first effort at a run in Houston. We accept ad we thank you for the event.

P.S. My man got himself the fastest time he’s ever gotten on a 10k today, and he didn’t even prep. He signed up late, did a two-mile run earlier this week, and hoped for the best in his shorts, tank top, light sweater thing, and gloves in the sudden near-freezing temperatures. And he did his best, quite literally. Super proud of him, and grateful to have him be with me in this beautiful, wonderful, awe-inspiring life.

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Sometimes…

Sometimes, life just feels really sucky.

And that’s completely okay. Truly, it is. Just allow it to be exactly as it is, and embrace it for itself. Treat it exactly the same as moments of awesomeness and joy, and they are all merely sort of life and can teach us something at every step… even when they suck.

You can do this, Banana… truly, you can.

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