Simon and Schuster

Thank you, Simon and Schuster, for delivering so many wonderful books both to the world and to me personally. I thoroughly enjoy what I have been able to read from your offerings, and I am so grateful you chose to take them on. Without you, many of them might never have reached the public and/or me. So, thank you for saying yes to them. Woohoo!

Yay, books! And yay to good publishing companies! Woohoo!

Thank you, God, for all of it. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Alas

We had plans to go to a dance class and small social tonight, and we were excited about it. It’s just down the road, not even five minutes away, and one of my good friends was going to go with us. But, after getting home after the afternoon workout – how many times can I use “after” in a phrase??? – my man and I both realized that we really just wanted to stay home for the evening. We both have a long list of things we want to accomplish after all the activities this past weekend, plus all the stuff we already had on the lists. And I start school stuff in another week. So, the pressure is on – I want to get a foot handful of this all handled before then, so I’ve to step it up and get crackin’ big time this week.

Anyway, we stayed home tonight. And I just say that I truly believe we both got a good chunk of stuff handled this evening, and we both are glad and grateful that we chose to stay home this time, even though we had been looking forward to the dancing. Thank you, God, for the discernment.

God, give me the way, the will, and the strength to get it all done this week, please. Bless us both with your grace and power in our endeavors. In your name, we pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

P.S. What, it isn’t 2023 yet? We just had Christmas on Monday. It must be time for the new year now, right?!

She has arrived!

She is here and we have her and it has been awesome! I actually cried when I picked her up at the airport, and very unexpectedly so. It both surprised me and didn’t. I really love and have missed getting to spend time with my step-sister these past several years. And I am so grateful that my man gave me such an amazing opportunity – I think he has only a glimpse of how significant and valuable this is to me and to my family – and that my step-sister said, ‘Yes’!

Thank you, God, for such amazing blessings. Please, help us to pursue your will and to be our best selves through it all – keep us safe, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Back in Business

The bed’s box spring was delivered this evening by one very smart, strong, handy, and gorgeous delivery boy. Did I say boy? I meant man, man of my dreams. Anywho, the bed feels fabulously better tonight compared to last night. No injuries or discomforts with it tonight. I won’t have to struggle leaning so far over to fold laundry ever again – that sucked today, for sure. And I can breathe more easily being higher off the ground. Yippee! Thank you, Man, for being my special delivery boy. And thank you, God, for such a blessing as he and this super comfy bed!! Amen!

Post-a-day 2022

Bedtime

Lying on the bed, we listen to “You’ve got a lover” by Shake Russell. It was not planned. I was just looking for a YouTube version to send to someone who loved it when we had sung it the other day. But I listened to the whole thing after sending it to her. We listened. And it was a beautiful bedtime meditation. Thank you, Shake Russell. And thank you, God, for such amazing creativity and talent and artistry and work to be shared with the world and with us specifically. Amen. Amen. Amen. Praise be to God. And thanks be to Shake. Amen.

Now, go listen to it yourself: “You’ve got a lover”

Post-a-day 2022

Feedback

Today, I was scared to give feedback. But 1) I knew it was important feedback, and 2) I have been working on being courageous and speaking up about things that are important to me in my life. And so, I declared that it would be better done than not, and I went and asked first if I might give a bit of feedback, and then, upon receiving the all-clear, I communicated kindly and clearly what the feedback was and why I felt it was so important (i.e. multiple others had mentioned it as their experience, too). I was sharing feedback about a new coach at our gym, but to the owner. He was grateful for the feedback, and he understood immediately what the issue was and why it mattered in our classes so much (without my having to say anything further about it). He thanked me for the feedback, and he even told me that it helps when it is coming not simply from him but from us, just through him.

It was a really cool experience for me. Sure, I was still a bit odd and nervous, but it went well and accomplished its outset goal. Plus, I got to be courageous. And that was certainly swell.

Thank you, God and Universe. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Missed again…)

All the little things

And then all the little things come together to give that little, wholesome, undeniable nudge. Suddenly, everything seems much simpler and easier – there is much less worry to be had, and life seems… lighter. Things aren’t solved or resolved. But they aren’t exactly a problem anymore. And, for now, that is enough for gratitude and much easier, freer breathing.

Thank you, God and Universe. Please continue to help me to be Your love in the world. Guide me with clarity to the embodiment of Your love through this life. In Your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Barely got it)

Gratitude, unbidden yet ever-welcome

And then, one day, you receive a letter in the mail – well, more like a trim-folded piece of notebook paper – that reads, “We sold our company! This non-taxable gift is a token of our appreciation for everything you have done for us and for being down with us through the years[…]” And, what’s placed within that once trim-folded piece of paper? A check for ten thousand dollars.

Dear God and Universe, might I have something fabulous like that happen in my life? Help me, please, to make such a difference in the lives of those around me that they would want and be able to give such a token of gratitude to me one day. Bless them so abundantly through me, please. Help me to be Your love fully. In Your name I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Barely got it right)

Breakthroughs of all sorts

踏み出す, fumidasu, stepping forward into that is next – that is my kakizome for this year, my intention expressed through calligraphy and hung in the wall where I see it almost every single day, multiple times a day, both consciously and unconsciously.

Today, I really did that – I stepped into who and how I want to be. In a situation that made me very nervous, I went ahead and spoke up, asked for what I thought I wanted, messed up a bit, figured it out, asked for what I really wanted – an extremely unreasonable request for the rest of my life -, and then I got it.

And It Was Spectacular. It was just what I needed, on all accounts. I am extremely grateful to God and the Universe for supporting me through all of this and for helping me speak up, now, and ask for what I want and need, especially when I am most uncomfortable to do so. Thank you, God and Universe. I love you all.

Post-a-day 2021

Tonight

My Opa died this summer. At least, I think it was this summer… this whole year and a half+ has been difficult for me to separate into time periods beyond the bulk term “recently”.

Tomorrow is his wedding anniversary with my grandma, and my grandma’s 91st birthday. So, my mom and I are staying at their house tonight – despite the 78° thermostat in here, which is a big youch! – in preparation for a small gathering of family members tomorrow. This time, instead of celebrating with Thanksgiving, as we usually do with a two-day celebration, it is a whole week before our Thanksgiving gathering, and it is without my Opa.

And I don’t know how I feel about that.

I also don’t know how I feel about my having such uncertainty…

I think I stayed away more and more as he got close to dying, potentially out of self-preservation. It was hard to be with someone who was so close to death, who so soon would be gone permanently. But also who, more and more, was less himself, as though he was ever so slowly departing from this life, until just the final bit exhaled one early morning, and finished the departure.

Perhaps life is like that. Perhaps it is only a passing-through kind of deal, where we are born, and, from that moment, we begin slowly to depart, slowly to rise to our highest selves, returning to our core and our maker, returning to our home. And maybe some people are more in touch with that home than most, already with one foot in the door, so to speak. Perhaps they never fully left, or perhaps they quickly leaped back. And perhaps the ghosts we have walking these grounds are the ones who have lost their way, or who are just not yet ready to return home. Perhaps they are the ones who forgot that, like college, life is only a stepping stone, not a destination.

Obviously, I’m rambling off in an unexpected direction here. I’m still not ready to deal with Opa not being here in person with me anymore. He was already not really here for a while before he fully left. So, while it feels quite different, his not being in this house right now, I’m also accustomed to it, and even relieved by it, considering the struggles of his body shutting down over the final year or so of his life here.

Anyway… I want to love people the way I felt and sill feel loved by him. With him, I always felt worth it, and I always felt good enough. I always felt loved, just as I was. I want to do that for those in my life.

God, help me to do so, please.

Amen.

Post-a-day 2021