I have much to do tomorrow. I think it is the only day we can be on campus this week, so I must get all the paperwork stuff finished… although, now that I think about it, I see that I could take them home, if needed. However, I don’t take work home with me. Though, I suppose it isn’t exactly work anymore, when the position has technically ended, time wise… hmm…. Hahaha

For some reason, I find that whole last bit hilarious. I’m such a dope sometimes, and I love it.

Anyway, I want to get all the paper grading finished tomorrow, anyway. It’s just a decent amount, so I will need to be rather on for much of the day, I expect. I will know for sure once I’m there and can see exactly what still needs to be graded. It might be less than I am expecting, but I know it is, nonetheless, a decent amount and will take at least a couple hours of working straight. So, I can expect easily to be at school until midday, even though I’ll be going straight from the gym. I’ll be showering at the gym, and heading over calmly, but I suspect I will be st school by around 7:15am, 7:30 at the latest.

And, you know what? I’m excited about it. I actually want to do this work. God has blessed me with this work; truly he has. And I am extremely grateful. May He find me more of it for these wonderful kids, because I want to give my life to the world through them right now and stepping forward into what’s next.

In His name we pray. Amen.

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Way too cold in the bathroom*

One of the greatest experiences of my life is still, on those cold nights in Japan, snuggling into my bed on the floor, the lamp on beside me, next to my book of the moment, and curling into my comforter and wool sheets (sheets, of course, brought from the US for my Ikea full-sized mattress) and fancy, cool-warm pillow (due to the memory foam and the intentionally not-wool pillowcase), after touching the tatami floor with my fingers and through my socks when rushing to the mattress, and shivering that initial full-body shiver as it begins its efforts newly to warm itself. Those moments of first relaxation, cuddled up like that in my bed, so lovingly and cozily held, those are some of my absolute favorite and most fulfilling moments of experience. It is as though, despite all the struggles and pains and aches of the day, as well as those yet to come, those warm and loving arms of my bed were there for me, ready and willing and able to hug and to hold me exactly as I needed, and whether I’d known it or not beforehand.

So, the cold and bitter winter bring back some of the best of memories.

*Which is why they sell the toilet seat stick-ons everywhere for wintertime use. And, of course, they are all different patterns on the fabrics, so they are included in the ridiculously cute nonsense known by all in Japan.

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Ce soir…

L’opéra, l’opéra, l’opéra at last. After nearly a two-year delay, Houston Grand Opera has returned to the stage officially, and we attended our first show tonight. It was lovely. Also, it was Carmen, and I love the music from Carmen. Sure, the story and lyrics are still totally typical dramatic and repetitive opera, but, goodness, that music is especially spectacular. I’m a big fan. (And I had a fan that I used during the performance, when it was a tad too warm early on. Then Carmen kept pulling out fans and using them herself. However, hers were used very much in a sultry, seductive way, and mine was merely used to cool my face and neck.)

Thank you, Georges Bizet, for this wonderful opera whose success you never got to see or know (He died only three months after its debut, and the reviews were not so great at the time.).

And thank you, God, for this opportunity in my life, and this gift to the world.

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One call (and a thousand miles*) away

19:21, I get on the phone.

Four hours, three minutes later, I hang up.

We were friends in middle school, and our lives have overlapped ever so slightly, like tiny tangents on a Venn diagram, since we parted ways for different high schools. However, those touches have proven always powerful and impactful.

This time, I didn’t wait for coincidence to bring us to the same place at the same time. I set up a phone call, both to ask a specific question and to hang out and chat. And it was well worth it. We only hung up because I kept yawning so much, and had to be up really early the next morning. Otherwise, we likely would have kept going much longer.

Thank you, God and Universe, for this so unexpected gift. This has been a wonderful blessing to end this day. I didn’t want to be alone today. And so, now, I wasn’t. Thank you.

*Siri said it is actually about 1,639 miles away by car.

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Pet me to sleep

I lie in my bed,
rubbing fingers gently up my head,

Comforting, pressing, calming…

They are putting me to sleep,

Just as they always seem to do

On the forehead of a dog.

Sometimes, I really do envy them,
I’ll take a back rub, belly rub, head rub,
Walk or run or roll in thr park
On any day
With the one(s) I lov
And who love me.

Perhaps all we really need on bad days

Really is a good pet

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P.S. Happy Day One to Year Six! ❤ <3=""


Today, I trusted my feelings, how my body and energy responded, and it was spectacular. Yes, I turned down an amazing opportunity – sailing – and opted to go to school, and get some work done. I didn’t leave until after eight pm to come home, and I had arrived to school around noon-thirty or so. But I got a tremendous amount accomplished, and it feels so freeing right now, I can hardly grasp it fully. I finished everything I had to do and wanted to do this weekend for school, and then some. I also accomplished several things I had hoped to do this past week, but hadn’t managed.

See, I had intended to go in on Monday to get some work done. But, as soon as I trusted my feeling that I didn’t want to do the sailing today, and communicated that, the easing of that allowed me to ask myself what I would like to do today. And the almost immediate response was: Go to school. So, after getting some nourishment for later and some gasoline, I headed there. My morning had been wonderful, spent with my dad (thanks to the last-minute removal of my part-time job’s shift to a coworker when I offered it last night), though even that was spontaneous when I was first considering what to do with my morning that I had free before the afternoon sailing. So, my dad and I walked and talked, and then ate and talked, and then stood around and talked some more. It was great.

I was fully ready to take on the schoolwork after that, and with joy and delight. I thoroughly enjoyed going in and getting things done… which has me thinking that I must really, truly love this work. What person loves going to work on a Saturday, loves grading nearly a hundred tests, loves creating documents and lesson plans, and loves doing it all for over seven hours on that Saturday, not getting home until close to nine pm?

And then still considers – and with delight – going back to get more done on Monday, just to stay ahead?

I am trusting that God and the Universe are helping me to see things newly in my life, and that they are preparing me for the wonderful opportunities that will continue to arise. I am trusting that my odd foot and leg pain was intentional, and that I needed not to attend the gym workouts this week, that I needed to ask for help from others, and that I needed to take a few tiny but real stands for myself.

I am trusting that I am exactly where I need to be, and that this buzzing of a feeling is exactly what it feels to be: a positive change approaching – a beautiful and powerful transformation of circumstance.

I am finally trusting.

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Sunday nights

Why do I almost always struggle to get to bed at a decent hour on Sunday nights? I fiddle around all day Sunday, exhausted, and then end up taking forever on something just before bed, getting me off to a dreadful start to the school week. Add to it my buttock and ankle pains on the right side, as well as a full day of classes, including an observation, and we have ourselves a recipe for an extremely tiring and uncomfortable Monday.


God, help me rest well, please.

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Bro, I don’t quite understand where God is directing me right now, but I am certainly following the calls and encouragements full-heartedly. There is now a very high chance that I will be helping with this martial arts thing at school, now, in the mornings… because, you know, I wasn’t busy enough already. 😛 My words and thoughts, by the way, and I believe them as both true and ironic. Haha

Anyway, must sleep ASAP, as it’s already after 9pm!

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Big sigh

Have you ever done something when you’re having loads of free time, and totally loved it, but then, tried it again, but without the free time, and been none-too-excited about it?

We just started up karate classes again after a month break. I have since started school, right? Now, more than ever, I am exhausted in the late evenings, getting into bed as early as possible, sometimes even at 6:40pm. Yet karate class is assisting the juniors at 6pm, and attending my own class at 7pm. If I attend the other classes throughout the week, they go even later. But I need loads of hours to move forward in my official training and belt levels (which I want to do).

So, I guess I need to sit down in the next few days, and figure out how many hours of what I need, and how quickly (or slowly) I can and want to make them all happen. Otherwise, without the specifics and the goals set up, I might get a little too tired to do any of it, especially with school happening right now. I do love this all. But I need to be rested enough to be able to enjoy it fully. Otherwise, the teacher and German within me will tear apart the instructors and assistants and other adults mentally, and be annoyed throughout all the classes for a plethora of reasons. I really don’t want to be that way. Alas, I shall make my plan and get some sleep!

Because I want to beast at karate. Seriously.

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Tropical Storm

Precautionarily for the expected wind, rain, and flooding, school for today was moved to asynchronous learning yesterday afternoon. So, I sent out e-mails to my classes to let them know their assignments for today, and just checked in every so often to answer the few e-mails I received from them with questions. I did one make-up test at noon – which was fortunate to be digital, as the student had broken a finger, and so struggles to write right now -, but, otherwise, I rested much.

And boy did I need that rest.

The gym was closed for the morning classes, due to the intense rain and wind, so I didn’t even exercise today. (I suppose I exercised my freedom of choice by choosing to be restful.) I only had to be up just before eight to send out those e-mails. Though I woke naturally at four, my body let me use the bathroom quickly and then pass back out. I only awoke to my alarm after seven, telling me to send out e-mails. And then, I went back to sleep for another little bit, and resting in near-unconsciousness with eyes closed for an hour-ish before getting up for real for the day.

I dressed cozily, had some easy, warm food, listened to my current audiobook, and, after that test, went to go through paintings with my dad.

Today was oddly simple, yet very satisfying. I think the work I did was exponentially beneficial, and so was much more impactful than it would seem initially. Thank you, God, for such a blessing today.

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