Realizations

It hit tonight that there were other factors involved in why I didn’t mind not being in touch with the neighbor mom anymore. I knew about some factors, sure. But a big one hit for me just a bit ago that had it make a lot of sense why I don’t mind too much that I no longer seem to have the acquaintance of convenience. It’s religious. She told me at one point that she and her husband both grew up Catholic – keep in mind that I already had had confirmed for me that they were not living an active faith of any specific sort, though I hadn’t known if they had ever had any kind of affiliation – but that they didn’t want to be Catholic due to political reasons. We didn’t ever talk much about it beyond what she had said at the time, and it didn’t play a role in my spending time with her or not.

But, once she no longer was accepting any offers I made to do things together nor was she countering them with her own ideas or offers, I kind of gave up bothering with the relationship. And I wasn’t really upset about it. I had to be more intentional with planning out my days, and so had to be intentional about sharing what I needed to share with my husband or my mom or here. But I was okay with all of that, it turned out. And that fact surprised me.

I thought much about it, though only ever rather passively. But it occurred to me tonight that the friends I have been trying to make all share a common faith with me. Ideally, they also have a baby near the age of my own. But the faith has been a higher priority. And I find it no wonder that I haven’t much missed or mourned the loss of someone who has the latter but lacks the former. Yes, it was very nice having someone who was going through similar things all the time. But our outlooks both on raising the babies and on life as a whole were not quite in synch enough to make it into a friendship. We were only ever acquaintances, and I guess we still are, just more distantly now.

Anyway, I think I saw her this evening from a distance. If it was she, then she has to be pregnant again, because she is massive. Most women gain weight during pregnancy, not after it. She was that way. So, maybe she never lost what she’d gained and is already pregnant again. (My theory is that she had recently gotten pregnant when she started acting weird and forgetful, around Father’s Day. So, baby would be due around March or so. Likely, she’ll be at this birthday party on Saturday, so I’m bound to discover the truth of it all.

God, guide me in your will, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Anyway… bedtime and well beyond it. Goodnight.

Post-a-day 2025