Oops

I stopped reminding my husband about things that matter a lot to me, in order to let him manage them how he wishes to do them, not how I wish for him to do them. I also have stepped back on helping manage his alarms. If he communicates with me in advance what his schedule is, I will set a backup alarm. I especially will do so if he goes to bed in enough time to get a good night’s sleep. But, if he doesn’t let me know before I’m going to bed, he’s managing the next morning on his own.

I was very scared to do that at first, and I still get stressed about it. I don’t want him to get in trouble at work. I don’t want him to be totally distraught, as he has been the few times he’s missed his alarms in the past. But I also don’t want to have to manage it for him. I want him to be responsible for himself. I’d be willing to do it all if he worked with me. But he doesn’t help me, so I’m stepping back. I set my alarms for the next day the evening before, and rarely right before I go to sleep. He doesn’t even start to consider what time he needs an alarm until he is lying in bed, at which point he is usually already falling asleep. So, he has completely missed setting them several nights, except that I have woken him and forced him to set them, or just set them myself on his phone or on my own.

Anyway, I asked him recently to get at least a certain amount of sleep each night, and he has done a very good job of honoring that. He hasn’t done it every night, and he needs more than that amount some nights in order to be fully rested. However, it’s been a move in a good direction for his well-being and my peace of mind.

So, that’s all I have to say about all of that right now.

Thank you, God, for your love and support. Please, keep us safe and make us well. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025