Moving

So, we don’t have a two-million-dollar house. But, when I look good and hard at what makes it feel ‘cheap’ or ‘crappy’ in comparison, I see that much of it can be improved with little monetary cost. I have touched up the trims – yes, they’re like five shades of white throughout the house, but the touch-ups, even in the one shade of white that doesn’t quite match most of them, already make it look loads better walking around the house – which look great now. Yes, they could be better, but they are very good for now. Tonight, I pulled out those special white sponge eraser-type cleaning supplies – like the Mr. Clean erasers, but the knock-off from the dollar store – and they worked wonders on the few places I used them. Our door to the garage (daily constant use), the hallway main wall, and one bathroom wall are all now in great condition, looking spiffy and clean in a way I’d never seen them. Thank you, erasers. More to go still, but each step is helping immensely, and I am grateful.

Still not a two-million-dollar house, but already much better than it was.

Thank you, God. Keep us safe, please, and pursuing and fulfilling your will in all that we are and do. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Painting

Sometimes, it is difficult to see the success of others without feeling I have failed, myself. I visited the house of a friend from high school this weekend. Not only is it a new-build, but it is a ridiculously expensive new-build. And, of course, everything within it looks perfect. And fancy, expensively simple.

Our house is not like that. I don’t think I want that specifically. But I know I don’t want to have five different shades of white on our baseboards and door trim throughout the house… which we seem to have.

We took in a paint sample from one door trim, and it matched perfectly… one side of the trim. The outside of the same doorway id a different shade of white, as are all the other doorways in the house. I went through to touch up all the chips and marks I couldn’t clean off of them, only to discover afterward that they all seem to be slightly different shades of white.

Somehow, it just makes me really sad right now.

And even more frustrated at myself for not having my career better sorted, such that I could take care of my family financially…

Also, my phone keeps getting worse. Now, the period seems to feel like not working very well, all of a sudden… So, there’s that financial frustration, too.

God, help me to heal and to find what is next for me, such that I be my best self and take beautiful and good care of my family and myself. Thank you for this chance toward growth. Help me to see clearly what you are calling me to do. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Home Dorks

We went to the hardware store. He fussed at me for fixing the displays of the doorknobs as we checked them out. Then, ten minutes later, he is fiddling with something that runs under the middle shelf all the way along the aisle. Eventually, I figure it out mostly and he come clean – there are lights above the doorknob displays, but only one set is on in the whole aisle. All the others are off. I join his efforts, of course, and we find the plug, hidden away behind the doorknobs. He goes to the other side of the aisle, shoves aside some cleaning bottles, and plugs in the extension cord. And voilà, the lights are all on and the displayed doorknobs look fantastic.

Good job, honey!

Even though that was a perfect example of hypocrisy. 😛

I love my husband and our weird ways.

Thank you, God. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Friday

Tomorrow is Friday, and I am grateful. I also have my meeting tomorrow morning to express the terrible-ness of this year at work, for which I also am grateful. I am nervous, too, because I don’t like being in trouble, and I worry it will make me be in trouble. However, I have prepared reasonably well for the meeting and it will be a relief to have communicated everything, so that I can move on freely and complete with this job and the nonsense that has gone with it this school year.

God, give me your words in my meeting tomorrow, please. Be with me. Keep us safe, please. Thank you. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Mid

Today was “mid,” as the teenagers now say. It was mediocre, so-so. I had some really hard times earlier in the day, and some good times in the middle, and then an awesome time at the end of the day, when I ran into old friends and family friends who were attending various events happening on campus this afternoon and evening. Now that part was awesome today.

I also really enjoyed running errands with my husband. They were short and so was his annoyance temper, but I enjoyed just hanging around with him while we did something useful together.

Now, I go to bed not as stressed as last night for tomorrow. I still am unhappy about my job, but I am handling things now in a way that seems to be helping so far.

God, help me to find my work and income to support myself and my family well. Thank you for this life and these trials for growth. Help me to be the woman I long to be. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Tomorrow

I go back to work tomorrow, to school. A big part of me wants to continue this life of getting things done for my home and family. I also know that, meager and unfair as it is, my salary will help significantly for our family, too. I only have a month left of it, so I would do best to take advantage of it while I have it. I can find what’s next when the time comes. Until then, I can wrap up this school year and the relationship with this school.

God, help me to continue to improve our house and home. Guide me clearly in my words and actions, that I be who you call me to be. Help me to love my husband fully and to honor him always. Help me to love and to trust myself, as well as you. Thank you for this opportunity in life. Help me to do well with it. Also, please, help us to have spectacular, loving babies and children, as we so long to have. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Struggles

It has been very difficult for me lately. It hasn’t helped that my husband is stressed with his schooling and work. We both have been stressed, and then also sad. Not to mention the stress we already had about figuring out how to organize and make our house function both well and to our liking – though either would be nice to start.

And he is doing a fast right now, which doesn’t exactly help him to be in a great mood. Though, to be fair, he’s doing much better than he has done on any of the juice cleanses he’s done, by far. Nonetheless, he is still doing a fast.

And I love my husband.

I wish we could have gone on a month-long honeymoon. I wish a lot of things that also are not in God’s plans for our lives.

I’m not sure where I’m going with these seemingly disjointed thoughts… I guess the point is that I am struggling, and we are struggling, and I love my husband.

Post-a-day 2024

Beach Day

We are supposed to leave for the beach at 8am tomorrow. Lightning and rain are expected in Galveston until at least midday. It has been pouring here for hours.

This beach day isn’t feeling great right now.

It is expected to clear and even be sunny by afternoon on Galveston, but still… I’m not thrilled to be up and out in a rainstorm in the morning… :/

Post-a-day 2024