My ant bite is still very much there, however, all the swelling seems to have gone away, which is great. Even the texture of it has seemed to disappear. Now, it’s just a slightly mean red splotch on my arm, no more itch, no more swelling, no more little bumps.
It just seems so wild to me still. Ha. Literally, I guess…
It is time for her to sleep on her own bed again. The pediatrician has given us great guidelines and a good plane and timeline for having this succeed, and in a way that truly protects the psychological welfare of us and of our child. Game on. God, guide us, please. In your name, we pray. Amen.
Because once wasn’t enough in one day, I had to deal with a poop-covered baby twice today.
The first time, it got all over the inside of her bear suit. My mom laughed and commented about whether it still smells of a bear poops and no one is around. I told her that I definitely didn’t hear it but totally smelled it.
The second time, she was just in a diaper, but it got all over me.
Both times, she put her hands in it and tried to grab me, and then ended up in the shower (though, I was with her the second time in the shower).
“This is just the beginning of my fawning over you in ridiculous ways,” I declared to my daughter tonight, just after being super excited as I talked to her about how she is nine months old now.
And I am looking forward to it, as each occasion arises.
Thank you, God, for these blessings and for this love. Help me to be the person you call me to be. In your name, I pray. Amen.
A large black ant crawled in my arm yesterday at the park and bit me. I crushed it and was sad about having crushed it, and also slightly annoyed at its having bitten me.
Today, however, as I was leaving the house, I discovered a large welt on my arm where the ant had bitten me, roughly an inch in diameter. I put stuff on it and head out. My mom was worried when she saw it, and she kept checking on it throughout the afternoon and evening. She felt like it might have gotten a bit larger throughout the day. However, her eyesight isn’t great, so this is not a reliable guesstimate. To me, it felt to be roughly the same as when I had discovered it. However, I couldn’t really see it due to its location.
Fortunately, I just got this supposedly great homeopathic insect bite stuff (for my daughter, but anyone can use it). So, I took the drops tonight and also put one directly on the welt for extra treatment, as directed by the doctor who had originally recommended it to us (also for ant bites).
I also looked up ant bite reaction photos on yahoo (because my phone is having a severe issue with Google right now due to something about server identity and verifying it or establishing a reliable connection with it… so my phone tells me all throughout the day, supposedly because of my IP address assigned to me phone by the phone company being messed up or something…), and found that a mild local reaction (“Localised urticarialreaction to ants”) can look almost exactly like the welt on my arm. So, that was a relief to have it mostly confirmed, as well as to learn that it is still no cause for concern, though it could last up to ten days(!).
Here you can see me frowning genuinely at the welt as I both see and photograph it for the first time.
I’m hoping it will be gone by tomorrow night.
God, heal me, please. Keep my husband and child safe and well, please, and show us the next step forward, please. In your name, we pray. Amen.
While I waited for my husband to finish pooping so that he could take our daughter from me in the shower, I figured it was the perfect time for me to catch up on the two missed nights of squats from my physical therapy exercises. I’ve had a handful of very hard nights when getting ready for bed recently, and so I’ve been aiming to get things done as fast as possible and to be lying in bed, ready to sleep, when I nurse my daughter for the last time before bed. In my haste and stress – because having a crying baby chasing me down or trying hard to grab and suck on the toilet really adds some stress to the routine – I have forgotten to do the squats before getting onto the bed. The other exercises are all things I can do once on the bed, so I manage to do all of those. But I have missed the squats twice, and then also forgotten to do them when she has finished nursing (It really takes her a while at bedtime.). So, I did them all on the shower, plus three extras for good luck. Then, I figured I’d do a third set of three extras, so that I’d have three sets of three extras, like a little blessing from God. And then I remembered that I still had to do the ones for tonight…
So, I did a total of 90 squats in the shower, plus the three bonus sets of three each. Super silly, but also super cool and fun in its way(!).
I honestly don’t know what to write about tonight. I’m so tired of all the same problems, I don’t want to get into them in any way… yet again. My husband was actually pretty great tonight when he got home. He said to me directly, ‘I love you. You know that my poor communication has nothing to do with you or with my love for you.’ And he said this while holding me (after I asked him to hold me for a minute), increasing its impact. It seemed like he said it because he understood why I needed to be held, that I was very much not okay after the lack of communication and my being left alone for longer than expected yet again. (Not to mention he had the day off of work, so we should have been able to spend time together. Though, that didn’t happen, and he got home as late as usual, roughly when I had wanted to be getting ready for bed already.)
He is dealing with a lot. I am dealing with a lot. We were both already dealing with a lot in the first place. Now it has increased.
God, please, help our baby to sleep in her own bed well again. Give us all great sleep each night. Help us to be our best selves. Make us well and keep us safe and whole. Help us to feel like a family, and to be a family. Thank you for our home and this life. In your name, we pray. Amen.
Having a breakdown creates an opportunity for a breakthrough.
God, guide me through this breakdown and into a spectacular breakthrough, please. Keep my husband and disgusted safe and well and whole, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.