Author: hannah.ananas

Tonight, my mom went to a concert of a friend of mine. And I didn’t mind. I got to listen, and even watch a bit, from the reasonable comfort of my own bed. Yes, my daughter was attacking me as she nursed for a good chunk of the time, but it was still much better if an environment than being out at a club in sketchy downtown Houston at 10:3 at night. It was enough to be out for a semi-late dinner in a loud environment with her. She needed to be home, and I needed to be with her, for the sanity of both of us.

Granted, as I typed that, she bit my nipple, so, not the greatest, after all. But still better than a loud and grungy club late at night, knowing my daughter is either crying or passed out (meaning I won’t get much sleep before she’s up to nurse again).

Anyway, thanks, Mom.

God, keep them safe tonight especially, please. Keep my husband and daughter safe and well always, please. Help us to exude love with one another always. Thank you for our family and home. Please keep it all safe and in your hands. In your name, we pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

We now are on the search for a new schedule with new routines to establish as our daily and weekly routine. The plane is here. It is approved for IFR flight. My husband started commuting daily today. (He got up at 3AM for it…) Now, we just need to find a balance for sleep, spending time together as a family and as a couple, and his flying.

God, guide us clearly and kindly in this, please. Keep my husband and our daughter safe and whole and well, please. Grant us awesome sleep each night together. Keep our home safe. In your name, we pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

Well, at least the smell will be gone from the garage now. My husband found two dead rats in traps he had set (but that I hadn’t been able to find when I first discovered the smell this week). He got rid of them tonight, so all should be clear again by tomorrow.

Yay.

I think… haha. So bad that there were two rats to be trapped in the first place. How did they get in? And when? And why?

Ugh.

Post-a-day 2025

I’ve noticed very recently that my subconscious has started to evaluate men again. Only the ones of a certain age range and wellness, but it has started to evaluate, nonetheless. Every time it happens, it makes me almost literally gag, and my stomach does a sort of nauseated lurch as I turn away, frowning. I do not like this. I do not like it at all.

And I especially do not like what it is suggesting.

As far as my subconscious is concerned, I am without a partner. And so, it has begun slowly looking for one, evaluating the quality and compatibility of the men I cross. My brain used to do it all the time. But it stopped pretty much instantly the day I met my husband.

However, he has been pretty distinctly absent from my life lately, and even more so these past couple weeks, and my brain knows it. And that scares me. Not that I ever would do anything to pursue it – I’m not afraid of that. I am afraid of the part where I have no control over my subconscious’s doing this. And I hate the experience of its happening in the moment, too.

God, free me from these fears, please. Help my husband and me to have the relationship we each need and want – help us to be our best selves with and through one another. Please, heal me of this utter loneliness. And please, keep my husband and baby safe and well and whole, and keep us always together as a family. Thank you for our home. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

W head a friends quest. I did more than half of it. My husband had two lessons to do. He forgot. It was the only time I haven’t just done it myself or set an alarm. Bummer.

But I kind of don’t care anymore. Since there’s no way to freeze the streak, so to speak, and my 99 in a row are now completely forgotten and cannot even be found anywhere, I’m pretty let down by the whole thing. And it makes me not much care about doing so well in the future. Weird, I know. But that’s how it all feels.

The company has been kind of going to crap the past couple years, anyhow, so I won’t be surprised if we end up no longer using the app at all at some point.

Well, it was fun for a long time, Duolingo, until you stopped caring about learning and cares instead about financial profits. Bummer. I used to recommend it to everyone. I rarely recommend it now.

Post-a-day 2025

I had started watching the show “The Gilded Age” a few months back. One of the things I was thinking about just now that had struck me so strongly at first was how well done the accents were for the show. They were somewhere in the 1800s US in the show, and the accents were both nostalgic for me and incredibly annoying. That early American accent has always rubbed me a bit raw. Haha It isn’t quite British, but it isn’t fully its own yet. It’s like a British accent that forgot to take its makeup off two days ago, and all the smudgy bits are still everywhere, and you can still see what makeup was applied, but the general effect has gone already. Same idea, but with an accent of an entire people.

Anyway, off to sleep before I meet my husband in a few hours at the airport. Yippee-yay!

Thank you, God. Please, keep my husband and my baby safe and make them well and whole. Keep us together as a happy and loving family, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

P.S. I think I actually already wrote about this, back at the time…

I may have encountered someone who would take up well the role of spiritual director for me. I was thinking about it all again lately, and then someone was awesome and supportive in just the right way today when I was struggling, and she also made certain statements that I do not often hear from most folks but that align with knowledge of discernment of spirits. And belief in it. That’s a big part, finding someone who truly believes in it all.

So, that could go in a really cool and awesome direction. It could also just be a standalone super positive and loving and helpful event. But it has the potential risk to be much more than that, so we shall see God’s will in this.

Thank you, God. Please, keep us safe and make us well. Please, keep Patrick safe and well and whole, especially with all of his travels tomorrow. Bring him home safely and well and happy to us each night going forward. Thank you for our home. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

I agreed to do this retreat with the understanding that I would be doing it with my mom. When we arrived, however, we were informed that everyone was divided into small groups and that we had to sit with our small groups the whole time and that my mom and I are in different small groups.

So, still processing that massive letdown.

My mom held the baby for about half the time, and I had her about half the time tonight. We shall see how tomorrow goes.

God, guide us clearly and always, please. Keep my husband and baby safe and well. Keep my mom safe, too, please, and heal her home and mind and body, please. Thank you for our home and family. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

Dear Sleep, join us tonight, please. Nourish us well. Help prepare us to be our best selves tomorrow and each day.

Dear Lord, thank you for our home and family. Please, keep us safe and whole, make us well, and keep us together. Make your will our will. Be with us always, please. In your name, we pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

Sophie Kinsella books really can be just the perfect bolster of my courage when I am struggling. Right now, “Twenties Girl” is really helping me emotionally regulate during a very tough time of life, both physically and mentally. It isn’t even about what I’m struggling with. But it’s the attitude and the mentality and the wild thoughts inside the head of the main character that make all the difference for me here and now.

Thank you, God, for good books. Please, keep us and our home safe. Help us to be our best selves each day and night, and to help one another be so. Thank you for this family and this love and this home and this life. Stay with us always. In your name, we pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025