Nipple tears

My breasts did the thing today for the first time (and, of course, continued to do it afterward each time), where they started dripping milk as soon as the baby started crying. It was sudden and silly. But it was also fun to see it happening.

Perhaps what was coolest about it was that I knew I wasn’t all emotional about her crying. Those who had told me about its having happened to them were always very emotional about their babies crying. I have not been and don’t seem to be at all like that. I feel for the child, but I’m not torn apart that she is suffering in this way.

So, it was cool to see how biology really does connect us so well, yet also in a silly way.

Post-a-day 2025

Chicken baths

It only took hours for someone to give me the dinner I had actually requested tonight. So it goes for people with ADD and a lack of experience caring for others who are basically bedridden.

Nonetheless, while lying on my side in the tub, right before bed, feeling like I might pass out due to nutrition, I finally got them to bring me the salmon I’d requested from the fridge. I was on my side, so my mom held the container for me while I used a fork in my free and exposed hand to eat the salmon. It was awesome and what I needed.

But it wasn’t quite enough. So, she then went and got what was supposed to be shredded chicken. It was sliced and chopped, which is completely different in terms of textures, but HEB clearly doesn’t care to have their labeling correct for such matters. Nonetheless, I had to root through it while she held it to find pieces I could stand and not gag on. Of course, they ended up being the smaller pieces. So, eating those on a fork meant that several pieces fell. And, recall, where was I? Yes, in the bathtub, doing a sitz bath.

So, I ended up having chicken pieces in my sitz bath right at the very end. Pretty sure I cried about it. But I only was in it a few minutes more, and the water was close to tepid. Plus, the chicken was fully cooked and only seasoned with salt. I showered and washed fully right afterward, too, so all should be well with my body on this front.

But seriously. Chicken in the bath. Ugh. It grossed me out so much. Ugh.

Post-a-day 2025

Birthday song

We recorded the baby making noises and sent it to my cousin for his birthday today, saying, “You recognize the song, right?”

She made silly sounds and threw in a few cries just before the end… it was just like the flow of the song, really. And I do mean that. It was very cool. Also totally silly. But cool and fun.

Thank you, Lord, for this family. Help us always to love and support one another. Please, keep us safe and well. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

Another day

The midwife said she expects anyone else in my situation would start feeling physically better after tomorrow. She hopes I will be like everyone else in this case. Her only concern on it is how I am hypersensitive and very aware of things going on in my body, and that that sensitivity will make things feel worse for longer. However, if people start improving at that point, there’s no reason I wouldn’t start improving, too. I might feel worse than the average person still – as I likely do right now – but I would start feeling better than how I have thus far felt.

So, that is a positive.

Dear Lord, please, keep us safe and well. Help my nipples to heal quickly and easily, and grant us an easy relationship with nursing. Thank you for all the love. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

Family nap time

This was a gorgeous time for us today. We all three were exhausted, and somehow ended up in a family nap together, bonding via sleep. Totally adorable and wonderful. But my body seriously aches, both from the physical effort of it all and from the actual things that went off-kilter in the labor and delivery – by God’s design, not by any human error or anything in the process. Everyone did a great job supporting me and the baby throughout it all. But the baby’s hand was in compound presentation, meaning that her right hand was up by her left ear. That makes the circumference of her “head” much larger to push out. So, that was painful in an intense way, and the resulting shredding of my vagina has been an intense addition to my recovery.

God, help us to heal and to bond together as a family, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

Gobsmacked

“When are you due?”

“Yesterday.”

A conversation I got to have multiple times today. Each time, the questioner was clearly gobsmacked.

But it was kind of fun. Haha

Aside from feeling physically very rough as a whole.

Nonetheless, it was cool to get to enjoy being pregnant in public today.

Thank you, God. Bless us with a healthy and whole baby, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

(Still didn’t have it right…)

Due dates

As expected, due dates are total nonsense. It’s a random day that is simply around when the baby will come out. An educated shot in the dark.

This is our baby on its due date today…

Mom is physically really struggling at this point, by the way. Me tell, she’s doing much better since having cleared the other night. However, the physical side is getting really tough at this point.

God, help me to heal fully. Grant this baby safe and natural entry into this world of having a body on its own. Help us to have a comfortable, love-filled, easy labor and delivery here at home together. Make the baby and me and my husband well and whole and safe, please. Thank you for this opportunity. I hand it over to you, fears and concerns and doubts and all. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2025

(Nope)