hannah ananas

I signed up to volunteer for a golf tournament this weekend. I was rather excited when I did so. However, I have been so utterly ill all week, and I still haven’t figured out well enough what specifically I can eat and drink successfully to help, I’m not so sure how tomorrow will go. It is an unfortunately strict event, what with a stupid clear bag policy. So, I can’t even bring a cooler with the few cold things I have discovered that I can tolerate. Surprisingly, cold stuff feels good, and room temperature water makes me feel ill almost immediately.

But, I figure, I am scared of going. So, I’ll go ahead and go. And, if it turns out I am too ill to last, I’ll let my leader know and just go home. Perhaps, moving around and interacting with others will be helpful for me. And perhaps they’ll have icy cold water to drink in all the coolers, and it will help balance the heat of the day.

Frankly, I think the heat might get to me too much, and I’ll have to bow out. But I’ll just let my leader know when I arrive what my situation is, and tell him I’m here to give it my best as long as it doesn’t seem detrimental to me. I might be able to step into cooler areas between golfers, and it might be quite tolerable.

I will be in God’s hands. I know how my day will look if I stay home. So, let us go and see how the day can be by going to be of service in something intriguing to me. Even though they don’t even allow pocket knives… this is Texas(!). Our government buildings allow pocket knives.

Anyway, I hope my day goes well tomorrow, no matter what specifically happens.

God, keep us safe and help us to be well this weekend especially. Help me to have exactly the foods that serve our bodies the best, as well as the drinks that serve our bodies best in being their best. Grant me strength and quality food, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Today has been tough. I got the final blood test done, and got to go see my mom right afterward, as she had been having lunch just down the street from the place. I cried multiple times today – very emotional without normal cause. It was good to see my mom and be hugged, as my husband has been gone for work and training the past few days.

I discovered that moving around does help me to feel better, and even went on a brisk walk this evening. It helped much, but the exhaustion only allows so much effort to be made before requiring a rest. The walk just about put me to sleep.

Hopefully, we can get the home gym set up this weekend, and I can get back to actual exercise. I need it now not only for my mental well-being, but also for my physical well-being in a whole new level. I need to move.

Perhaps, tomorrow, I’ll sit on the stationary bicycle and watch a movie or something for a while. Rest while moving… it might help just as I need right now…

Okay, too tired to function anymore, now hat my husband has safely landed. Goodnight.

God, thank you for this life and this day’s blessings. Keep us safe and well, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

I turned in all my stuff today to the school where I had worked this year. I rechecked a student’s exam, per his request, to confirm that he did not, in fact, answer all of the free response section of the test. (That part was quite sad, actually. He had prepared reasonably well for the exam and would have done great on it – he’d gotten full credit on everything else. He would have been very close to a hundred had he not completely gone dumb and ignored the directions, skipping entirely the two French short-answer questions… which we had practiced in class… ::big sigh. He so could have done it.)

Surprisingly, it was mostly painless. I didn’t run into the folks who ruined the school for me, so that helped. But the people I did see were very sweet and genuine. One even chased me down across campus to make sure he could say goodbye properly to me. That was super sweet and meant a lot to me.

Thank you, God, for the love and care and courage today. And thank you for getting me out of a place where I am not fully welcome and wanted. Help me always to pursue and fulfill your will, being my best self. Keep me and my family healthy and well and together and loving. Help us all to trust in you always and in all ways. Thank you for this life and this love, and thank k you for your love. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

I had to get another blood test today. Fortunately, an old neighbor mentioned what specifically to say so that the technicians would use the smaller needle for me. It only takes an extra few seconds total, but they almost always use the larger needle since it is faster.

When I went a previous time, I had mentioned that it was always very physically painful for me. The technician offered to use “the smaller needle”. I was delighted to discover there was a smaller one. All went well. It still hurt, but not as badly as usual. The next time, however, when I asked for “the smaller needle”, the technician kind of scoffed and said something to brush away the request, as though there only was one needle size. I felt duped, but also remembered looking at the needle the previous time – it had been smaller than the one in front of me right now.

Naturally, I bruised on this one.

When I went back this weekend, I imagined I had made it up about the smaller needle, and was too embarrassed to say anything about it. I didn’t bruise this time – the lady was very gentle and kept apologizing, because she truly saw how painful it was for me. But it still very much hurt, and it left a blood mark that still is there and slightly tender.

Nonetheless, an old neighbor who is also a nurse told me afterward to use the phrase “butterfly needle” and, if needed, “I respectfully request that you use a butterfly needle,” should the technician try to use the standard one despite my initial request.

So, when I went today, I requested a butterfly needle, please. The lady didn’t say anything, but went briefly into another room and came back with a little package thing. She gathered the rest of her supplies, then opened the little package. Of course, it was the smaller needle with the little ‘butterfly’ wings to hold it steadily and the flexible tube for the blood to transfer to the vile indirectly.

I kid you not, it was loads better than the other day. It absolutely still stung and was sore for a while afterward, but nowhere near as much or as long as usual. And that was great.

My body clearly is not about being messed with. I am, therefore, grateful for the help I was given in helping to ease the stress and pain of this current situation.

Thank you, God, for the greater ease of today’s test and interaction. And thank you for the care I was given by my friend today afterward. Keep us safe and well, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

I can tell that my body needs sleep and rest – it is exhausted from the intense mental and emotional strain and storm that has occurred this school year, but it is also physically tired from them. What’s more, my body is now tired from all the new stuff going on.

So, summer is here at a good time, in the sense of giving me space to rest. But it also makes it all the harder to get anything accomplished, because there is only ever a vague timeline during the summer… and vague timelines don’t very well get me to get stuff done that I don’t quite feel like doing… especially when I am exhausted.

God, help me, please. Keep us safe and well, please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

Just a delightful reminder that Vicks Vapo Rub has to change the spelling of the company’s name in German-speaking countries, because “Vick” is basically a curse word in German. The actual word, “Fick”, is the culprit. But they are pronounced exactly the same in German, “Vick” and “Fick”, and the latter in English just changes its i to a u.

So, Vicks didn’t want to be called ‘Fu**s Vapo Rub” in German-speaking countries. Thus, they use the name “Wick”.

I hope you enjoyed this fun language lesson. I think of it just about every time someone mentions Vicks.

😛

Post-a-day 2024

We have positive news. The day is good. I get a single piece – though, it is significant, it is still only one single thing – of stress-inducing news, and I am suddenly on a state of depression the rest of the evening.

Seriously?!

I suppose it definitely doesn’t help that tomorrow is my last day at work. I’m still frustrated about how much of that all went.

Nonetheless, it will be good to be rid of that energy and of those who are against me.

God gives us a path forward. Always. Perhaps it is a matter of our being willing to look in a different direction and take a turn before we can find it. Perhaps, I have slowly been removing my blinders this year, and am learning to turn my head another way.

Thank you, God, for this new employment and for the love of and gratitude for me that they so clearly have. Help us to be mutually beneficial to each other, all while being those who you call us to be. Keep me and my family safe, please, healthy and holy all. Heal what is hurt, what is broken, please. Help us all to be the best we can be, the people you call us to be. Help me to find ease and trust in you fully. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

I love my husband. I also am exhausted and have no excuse for going to bed after two AM. But I got a lot done by staying up so late, including the unexpected trivia night participation with my husband over dinner at the wings place.

Thank you, God, for my family. Keep us safe and well, please. Heal us where we need and want to heal. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024

So, the interview went very well. The round of golf, not so much. We got there, only to find out it was now canceled. Not rescheduled. Just canceled. That was frustrating. Several of us decided to go ahead and play, anyway, since we were there, though it was no longer paid for by the school. But it was the first twilight pricing, so it was a reasonable price for a round of golf. However, as I went up to tee off at the first hole, the storm arrived in full force, and we had to stop. We waited in the pro shop for close to an hour until the rain stopped, got a rain check to play another day, and then went all the way back home.

So, still haven’t played that first round of golf. But we definitely looked like a very cute couple today. And I filled it the background check paperwork on my phone while we waited in the pro shop. The lady was very impressed that I sent it all back to her so quickly. 😛 Silver linings, I suppose… that and the fact that I didn’t have to interact with any administration who might secretly hate me (still unsure on that one, so prefer to keep my distance from them all, really… sadly…).

Anyway… we were both exhausted, though. After we got home, I lay down to watch a movie. My husband did a few things in the yard for maybe half an hour, then he came in and sat down. He said he was doing e-mail before going back outside. Not even twenty minutes later, he had switched chairs and was passed out, phone in hand. He didn’t get up for another few hours.

He was a tired pup. I opted to stay awake until bedtime, but just take it easy, so I passively watched some shows and a movie before trying to go to bed. At which point he woke up, went outside briefly, and then wanted to eat something and watch another couple shows with me… but then he finally went to the gym and I came to get ready for bed.

We are exhausted.

God, help us to rejuvenate. Help us to be our best selves. Keep us all safe here, please. And thank you. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024