What do I really wish?
Not just for all of this to be fixed and for things to be clean and perfect and fresh, and for everything in my life to smell good or odorless… as much as a large part of me desires that, something deeper within me wants something more…
This part of me wants to be free of that extreme-desire-slash-necessity altogether… sure, I want things to be clean and perfect and sanitary and beautifully scented (or scent-free)…, but I want that to be just a want, not a near-incapacitating desire.
I want to be free of that need for everything to be so clean.
I wish to be myself, not this brain-trapped version of me.
That’s what I really wish.