Still here

Still here, being angry..

I’ve shared with a handful of co-workers at this point, and that ha scariest helped immensely. I’m still craggy and pissed off at regular life at school each day, but it helps, nonetheless.

I’ve started actually typing out a list of all the crap with which I have been dealing with my job this year, all the unfairness. I’ve reached out for contributions from my mom and husband, as well was a co-worker who has been there to hear it all and help me through a lot of it throughout the year so far. I think I’ll ask another coworker for his input, too, tomorrow. Then, once I’ve gathered all the points, I’ll put them in order and in a letter, and send a printed and a digital copy to the principal early next week, I guess. If I am granted the requested meeting with him sooner than that, then I will have it ready to hand him in that meeting. Whatever the case, my points will be communicated and documented, and I can move forward complete on it all, having been in clear communication.

Anyway, though I’m really relieved about that, I’m still utterly exhausted. All this emotion and all this lack of sleep has been especially tough this week.

And I really miss the dog. I miss the future we were living into, becoming a family of four. Now, we are a hopeful but woeful family of two. My husband is my dreams come true, of course. But the rest of this has been sacrificial suffering, without our understanding the ultimate goal of the suffering, which has made it al the harder.

Nonetheless, I am exhausted, and so I am going to sleep now. Getting closer and closer to being in bed when I truly want to be these days(!). So, yay for that(!). 9:30 lights out tonight.

Thank you, God, for the home and bed and husband. Amen.

Post-a-day 2024