Today, I have been in an area that feels like the end of my whits in terms of toleration of things. Even the little things, the ones that usually are very oh, well, whatever to me, evoked strong reactions from me today. To be fair, I did have a good amount of nonsense and frustration today with school. And I am quite tired. I struggled driving home tonight, and it was hardly after 8:30. By 9:00, I was sort of an angry emotional wreck, desperately prepping and eating some food, in a state of distress. Now, showered and sitting on my bed, I have tears edging their way out of me, though I haven’t felt any in waiting all day. (Except for during the really good bits of the opera, of course, but that’s totally different from the rest of the day’s events and emotions.)
I am angry, to at least frustrated, and I’m not sure why… and I worry that it is for health reasons that I am so stressed. Part of me wants to be right, but I think more of me wants to be wrong… and I worry that I am right, anyway.
I’m hardly making sense, I think, so I’ll just go to sleep, possibly sobbing a bit to relieve whatever this is coming up right now. I had a similarly-strong-emotion day this past weekend, and I wonder if they are related to the same underlying concern to which I have considered attributing today’s emotional state.
Anyway… goodnight, please.