Here, and now

I am back home now.  It feels simultaneously very weird and very regular and okay.  I don’t quite know what to make of that.  I’m partly worried that I’ll go all paranoid and panicky at some point, be it suddenly or slowly and surely…  I hope that I remain calm and loving to myself – that will make everything okay for me with all of this.  My fears, though founded, can turn minor now.  And, though I was afraid even to come back here, I know it is the right place for me to be. I am scared, but I am facing my fears, little by little, but head-on…, and I can do it. I can do this. I can bloom and blossom right here, right now, and each day and night going forward. I can be true to myself, and take care of myself, and love myself. And I can do it right here, in this place that, for now, is – still – my home.

Post-a-day 2020

Another mountain awaits

Today, I climb Fuji-San.  Well, it’s tonight that we actually climb, starting around 9pm, but I’m on my way to catch the bus to go to Fuji-San now.  Truly, I think Inhave never been so terrified of anything in my life.  People relate to climbing Fuji-San from both ends of the spectrum, and it is rather unnerving.  Some are absolutely amazed at the feat I plan to make.  Others casually respond that, ‘Oh, sweet.  Yeah, I’ve done it four times. It’s cold up too.’  Still others are solid in their desire never to do it again, nor anything like it.  Suffice to say that I have no idea how this will go.  Not really, anyway.  I have hopes and thoughts, but we’ll see how all of it goes, now, shall we?

Happy Trails to me!

Post-a-day 2017