Why must I have such a sensitive stomach? Why?
Ugh!
I just got over having an actual mild fever due to some kind of food issue in my stomach. Now, after feeling actually good today, I have to end up with a dinner that makes me feel like I’m about to be spewing from both ends at once? Really?
Ugh.
God, help me, please. Heal me. Heal us. Please. In your name, I pray. Amen.
Post-a-day 2023
I felt like I was truly in “Christmas Vacation” yesterday, when I poured myself a bowl of Cap’n Crunch cereal. You see, this bag of cereal has been open for months, truly. And it has been not just open but not even clipped shut the past month and a half, at least. Basically, there was no way I was expecting anything other than stale, slightly squishy and likely no-crunch cereal when I went to bite into this cereal. No way. This is Houston, Texas. We don’t have non-stale cereal that has been opened more than a couple weeks at most, and that’s with a good, tight roll and bag clip.
No, there was just about zero chance this cereal would be anything more than slightly-satisfying stale stuff.
And yet, as I bit down on the first two pieces, just to have a sample before eating it with (almond) milk, I was shocked with a genuine, solid, and real CRUNCH!
My immediate thought was, It’s that non-nutritive cereal varnish! No joke.
Not sure of what that means? Well, do read:
“Oh, the Crunch enhancer? Yeah, it’s a non-nutritive cereal varnish. It’s semi-permiable. It’s not osmotic. What it does is it coats and seals the flake, prevents the milk from penetrating it.”
Still lost as to where I’ve gained this bizarrely unique information about cereal? Allow me:
Clark: I went ahead and I put a 7500-dollar deposit down on it.
Bill: You're the last true family man.
Mr. Shirley, approaching: Mark!
Clark, sipping: Mmh. Clark.
[silence]
Clark: That's Bill, sir.
[silence]
Mr. Shirley: Are you the one who was working on that non-nutritive cereal varnish?
Clark: Yes, sir.
Mr. Shirley: I’ve gotta give a speech to a trade group. I'd like to mention it. Write up a brief summary and have it to me by the end of the day.
Clark: My pleasure.
Mr. Shirley: Layman's terms! None of that inside bullshit jargon that nobody understands.
Clark: Yes, sir.
[Shirley starts to leave]
Clark: Oh, Mr. Shirley… Ah, we got your Christmas card the other day, and my family and I are very flattered that you remembered us.
[silence]
Associate: Corporate cards.
[silence]
Mr. Shirley: Don't forget that report, Bill.
Clark: Yes, sir. Thank you. Merry Christmas…
Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Merry Christma— Kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass.
Happy Hanukkah.
My own personal serving of cereal with an almost-definite non-nutritive cereal varnish that worked wonders! 😛
Happy almost Christmas in July! ‘Tis the season, ne?! 😛
Post-a-day 2023
She says in Spanish, ‘Is there another salsa? A green salsa?’ The waiter replies in Spanish that there is a cilantro, creamy green sauce that is kind of a topping sauce. ‘Yes, could we have that also, please?’ He agrees and thanks are given.
So far, they have gone through almost two normal containers of the red salsa, eaten almost entirely by him, her man, not the waiter. They continue eating the chips with the delicious red salsa.
After less than a minute, a small container of delicious-looking green creamy salsa arrives. It is smaller than the size of a shot of alcohol, much smaller than the regular red salsa dishes on the table. She looks down at the green salsa. He, her man, not the waiter, looks down at the green salsa. The two look at each other briefly before she, with a lightning-fast move, grabs the green salsa and moves it to her far corner of the table, out of his reach.
He does not share food well. He admits it fully. He devours food. Sharing happens only by speed and force, before he can finish eating, or else it usually doesn’t happen at all. They both know that this is why she has taken the salsa. Two normal dishes of red salsa have been eaten entirely by him at this point. She has full rights for her move. But he doesn’t trust her, because he wouldn’t trust himself if he’d been the one to grab the green salsa first (which he’d tried to do).
He retaliates by grabbing the chip basket and moving it to his far corner of the table.
It is a Mexican (food) stand-off. She says as much, chuckling.
They begin negotiations. ‘Let me get a scoop, and I’ll give you three chips.’ ‘Let me get that scoop for you, so you don’t take all the salsa in one scoop.’ ‘No, let me get the scoop, or I won’t give you any chips.’ ‘Then you won’t get any salsa.’ ‘Okay, put the green salsa over here for one scoop, and I’ll give you three chips.’ ‘How about I hold the salsa over here, and you can get a FAIR and small scoop yourself, then give me three chips?’
They reach an accord.
She holds it tentatively to make sure he doesn’t scoop half of it out in one go. He surprised her by confirming that his amount is okay, and even wipes a bit back on the container before asking. She approves. He eats. She asks for her chips. He gives her one.
The container is small, so she breaks the chip in half. She dips and eats one half and dips and gives the other to him. He gives her another chip, and the process repeats, repeatedly.
‘See?’ she asks. ‘I told you I would be fair with the chips and the salsa.’ He just smiles and eats another bite of chip and salsa.
After a while, she has had her fill and hands the container off to him. He devours what is left in mere moments, it seems. They both know she was right to take the salsa, though he doesn’t want to admit it, and that’s okay for both. They got the chips and salsa they had wanted, and they got them together, which was what had mattered most.
………..
I just hope you can see us being idiots at the restaurant tonight. 😛
Post-a-day 2023
Firstly, yes, I am still sick. Improved further, but still breaking into uncontrollable fits of coughing here and there, making my throat sore sheetlet from the intense coughing. My abdominals are less sore, which is a clear improvement. And my throat doesn’t have the burn to it anymore. Also, there seems to be less coming out of my nose as a whole from either direction, which is good. I also can kind of talk again. Though, the taking aggravates the coughing, so it is only so helpful… 😛
Now, down to business: quick karma., as I called it.
So, my man is juicing. Why? He’s struggling with learning portion control and containing himself in general when tasty food is around. He’s doing a fitness challenge right now, and wanted to do six days total (with two rest days in the middle) of having only these set juices as his ‘food’ for the day, as they help ‘cut’, as the guys all call it. Juice cleanses and juicing in general are by nature very low in calories, making them one of many ways people choose to help cut down their fat levels, especially after bulking up.
Well, that’s what my man is doing right now: cutting, in the form of juicing.
However, he keeps eating little bits of valentine’s candy here and there. 
And then, here’s the kicker. I heard him say earlier how he wanted pizza. Clearly, he saw the leftover pieces from our Valentine’s Day meal together – yes, we had agreed ahead of time that we wanted our meal together to be Costco pizza, because it’s amazing and because a slice is almost like a heart shape – sitting in the fridge. However, he doesn’t seem to act on the desire, and so I say nothing about it, so as not to make it harder on him by talking about food. (He really struggles mentally on these cleanses, in ways I’ve never understood.)
Hours later, he finally rushes out the door to go to the gym for his nightly workout session. It takes him multiple trips back and forth to the car, but he finally sets out, and I start to get ready for bed.
I notice that I’m feeling a little low on something in my own diet, and so go to the fridge to see what can help remedy my situation. The berries I bought will do just the trick, I think. As I pull out the box of blackberries, I end up glancing down at the pizza slices on the edge of the bottom shelf.
But something is wrong… There is too much space. How can this be??
I take a closer look at the pizzas. I know in a moment what is odd about them. They aren’t odd… they’re even… they’re only two.
P——!
I send him a message. I state his name first. Then send another message. “I’ll let you guess what I’m about to ask you…”
He quickly replied with a clever, “Stop.
“🔨🕰️”.
I reply, “Collaborate and LISTEN
“Last chance to guess
“Let’s collaborate on ideas of what this problem might be haha”.
We’re idiots, I know.
He responds, “Yes I left some lights in
“On*”.
“Not a problem, love”
And then I add, “What I’m wondering, is how, when I wrapped and placed three pieces of pizza in the fridge yesterday, there are, somehow, only two in there now… how could that be, when I didn’t eat any pizza today, and you’re on a juice cleanse?”
He immediately responds, “Lolololol”.
A moment later, he adds, “I knew I forgot something… look near our pantry”.
Sure enough, sitting atop the aluminum foil box and zipper baggies is a massive slice of Costco pizza, still wrapped up in foil and cool from the fridge. It hadn’t been there long.
After I discover the pizza slice, he adds, “Dang
“And I still didn’t get to eat it”.
Durn straight he doesn’t get to eat it. In case anyone forgot here, HE’S ON A JUICE CLEANSE(!!!!)! What’s he doing here, trying to cut with a juice cleanse, and then eating a massive slice of calorie-rich pizza??? No wonder he has trouble with self-control under normal circumstances… Ugh! This man… boy, do I love him, but, sometimes, I just can’t see where he’s coming from on things. 😛
And talk about instant karma… he sneaks a slice of pizza, but ends up forgetting it at home. What’s more, if I hadn’t mentioned anything about it, the dog likely would’ve found the slice before I did. Then it would’ve been long gone and made a mess on the carpet in the dining room (where the dog, no doubt, would have eaten the pizza). So, his getting caught actually made the situation better for all. Because the dog doesn’t need that much pizza either – she’d hurl in the middle of the night. Yet another mess he’d have to clean up…
Anyway, with that, I’m going to sleep: I probably rambled telling that all, but that’s where I am in my need for sleep. I wish you a lovely night and day. May God bless you all. Amen.
P.S. Please, God, heal me. Amen.
Post-a-day 2023
I’ve been feeling loads better today. My man has improved further, too. We both slept in late, then I joined my man for the end of walking the dog, then I sat on the sofa for hours, my belly feeling all shook up…
This afternoon, I managed a bit of food, noticing I was very hungry but wanting to be careful not to overdo it. I learned quickly that a little was enough for now. Boy, do I dislike stomach sicknesses…
I look forward to wanting food again, instead of feeling slightly revolted by the idea of actually putting any of it into my mouth… ::big sigh
Post-a-day 2023
Tonight, I saw this happening, asked about it, was told that she, the one I was asking, preferred Coca-Cola, clarified what I saw, laughed as everyone realized I wasn’t just talking nonsense, and then actually took a bite of the taco to discover whether it was any good.
And yes, it actually was good.
How bizarre, right?
Post-a-day 2023
No joke: these serving sizes for food have been massive. The drinks are mostly somewhat small, when compared to the USA. But the food portions often feel even larger than their counterparts would be in the US.
Every meal, we order food and wonder if we might need to order more later, as we are so hungry and the description makes it seem to be only so much food. And yet, after we start eating, we find that there is almost no way we could eat all the food we’ve already ordered, even if we tried(!).
So, we keep aiming to manage our food better at every meal, and we keep getting surprised at every restaurant by how much food they keep giving to us. Sure, they aren’t the lowest meal prices. However, the dish always covers more than the cost for us, and by a lot.
Oddly, I can hardly wait to get back home and eat light foods and small amounts of them!
Post-a-day 2023
I made a paleo/Whole30 chilli on Sunday evening, and then ate it yesterday and today. (I froze the majority of it, as my man is still on his juice cleanse he wanted, and he even stops day away from me, so he could have two three-day cleanses, instead of one five-day. [Recall that he wanted carbs for the 10k Sunday morning, so we ate food Saturday night and on Sunday, then he resumed the juice cleanse Monday.]) And, golly, is it good! I had never made chilli before, and was totally nervous I would make a pot of mediocre soupy stuff that I can’t stand for more than a few bites. Instead, I ended up with a vat of one of the best chillis I’ve ever had. Gratitude, God! Yay! Thank you, Heavems, for giving me a good recipe and for helping me actually do well in a super complex recipe. The more steps and ingredients they have, usually, the more likely I am to make it turn meh. So, this was a wonderful surprise.
The not-wonderful surprise was the massive trail of ants that attacked the cornbread when I’d left it (covered) on the counter yesterday for a couple hours. It was kind of terrible. Plus, we lost the cornbread… and I only get Jiffy cornbread when we want that down-home southern feeling, which we did for this meal. With its being so cold and wintery right now, that was exactly the feeling we’d wanted. And I’d left out the cornbread so that I could pack it up and freeze it after I’d had lunch. So much for that idea… Anyway, the chilli is now frozen and waiting patiently for my man, and that’s a positive.
Oh, and I’ve had soup yesterday and today both. I think I’ve been fighting off a virus or cold, as I’ve been absolutely exhausted – couldn’t even do almost anything Monday. This evening, I started getting a headache after I’d napped, and then started getting progressively colder at karate class. I ended up going home after we realized that everyone else found it on the warmer side there, and they were actually sweating. Likely that I was building a bit of a fever there. They told me to go home and eat some soup. Little did they know that I’ve basically been doing that the past two days already. 😛
Nonetheless, I need to be ready for the cold, outdoor test Saturday morning, so I need to heal up and eat well (in addition to preparing for the actual test, which includes performing a weapon kata that I haven’t quite yet created…). At that, I bid you a good and blessed and rest-filled night!
Post-a-day 2022
“How are you feeling today?
I’m feeling dreadful. My stomach hurts, I off and on feel like I might vomit, and my body is miserable.
Talk about detox.”
We have been eating loads of junk we don’t usually eat, mostly because of the season – candy (Halloween), pumpkin pie (Fall), eggnog (almost Winter), pizza (because we get it at Costco, where we get the pumpkin pie), and chocolate milk (because we’re already drinking the eggnog, which is dairy!). So, we determined that a juice cleanse was in order. And we started it today. And I have never had such a struggle with a juice cleanse in my life as I had today. Goodness, I felt dreadful. And I also was freezing all day long… and I might have actually had a fever… Like I said, it was rough today.
Post-a-day 2022
But don’t eat it…?
Twice now, within a few weeks, I have attended a birthday celebration for a child’s first birthday. (To be clear, they were for two different children.) In both cases, when it came time for that special cake smash and devour, the baby was utterly disinterested in the cake. Dads stuck a finger-full of icing into the baby’s mouth. The baby showed no interest in finding more of the sugary stuff to eat, let alone touching it.
And it has me wondering, Are babies already clear that they want the healthy stuff, but we just condition them to like the junk??????????(!!)
A bit scary, I think…
Post-a-day 2022
hannah ananas 