Tag: help

Stress

Today was tough for me, filled with emotions, both of my own and of others. I did things in ways that weren’t the best, but that were the best I could do with the information and experience I had at the time. Now, only hours later, I certainly would do them differently, if presented with the opportunity again. Sometimes, that is hard to accept, knowing so soon how I could have done something so much better than I did. But, as I said already, I did the best I could with the available information. Now that I have more, I can act differently going forward. I did well at first, and I will do well in the future. Every event is a lesson available to me, allowing me to improve for the future. Today was no exception.

Dear God, please, help heal those in need of your healing. Help release the strain held so heavily and highly by the student today. Help him to accept fully your love and to trust in you. Help him to accept the help he needs and wants. And help him to let go of the restraints that prevent him from getting that help. Heal him, please. Thank you for this blessing of such trust. Thank you for this life. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

Moving day

Tomorrow is moving day for my grandma. There is much to have happen and much to do both tomorrow and throughout the weekend.

Dear God, please, help to heal my grandma. Help her to her appointment with the chiropractor on Tuesday, and allow her to accept the healing offered by the chiropractor. Help my grandma to see that is is wanted here and is fully capable of being here and living a fulfilled life, even and especially now, though she has lived blessed already so many years. Help her to have a few more wonderful and fun and love-filled ones with us here. In your name, I pray in gratitude. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

Smugglers

I prefer that term to the one actually used, traffickers, as the term used makes me think painfully of human and child versions of it. Super sore subject for me, which only increases the pain of the actual topic at hand.

Anyway, we crossed a National Geographic show that was a documentary-esque suspense-injected show following federal police at airports in Peru and Italy who track and aim to prevent drug trafficking. At first, it was really cool to see the police work and to work so well. But it eventually just became increasingly sad – all the people involved in the trafficking have miserably sad problems that led them to make the smuggling attempt in the first place. Most of them were convinced by some outside source that it would work and that they would receive enough money from that someone afterward that would solve some major problem in their lives. In a way, advantage was taken of them, and some even were conned into doing it.

These people’s lives are then directed to years in prison, the single instance of drug transfer is stopped, and the origins of the drugs in the first place are left practically untouched. So, it may make things a bit tougher for the drug organizations to distribute their drugs around the globe, but what do they truly care about a small amount stopped at an airport? It cost them only that small amount, and the people imprisoned were no skin off their backs. They likely will find more sad and desperate people to take the risk the next day, again and again.

The cycle is not stopped, only disturbed with a small ripple.

The one consolation I had – that they may at least have a place to live with food and water once imprisoned, keeping them off the streets and from utter poverty – was dashed at the mention of the high likelihood that they might be “removed permanently” by the drug folks and their connections within prisons.

How utterly sad… all of it is immensely sad.

Though it is a new way for me to look at the world, I can see very easily how this very much is the work of the devil. (Yes, that still sounds weird to me, but I believe it nonetheless.)

Dear God, please, help us to heal the broken people. Help the most broken ones to return to you and your guidance. Help us all to repent and to turn fully to you and your will, at all levels and in all places and at all times. We are all in such need of you – help us to hear your call and to respond lovingly to it and with the immediately due haste. Help us, please, to love and to be filled with your love. Help us to embrace your love such that we can always and powerfully reject the devil and his ways. Help us to start to heal your people and this beautiful world you created and in which we still are blessed to live. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

Important

While emotionally difficult, the film “The Sound of Freedom” is an important and valuable film, especially for those who have little exposure to information of human trafficking and its statistics.

Human trafficking is a true thing, unfortunately, and, many could say, undeniable work of the devil, as spooky or odd as that might sound. I, myself, had the thought tonight, Why does God allow this? And I realized immediately: He doesn’t. It is not God’s will or work at all…

So, go see “The Sound of Freedom”, a film that portrays rather well the true story of a Homeland Security officer who was moved by the encouragement of God to valuable, illogical, immensely dangerous, and life-saving action. Then, spread the word to upload hotel and hotel room photos to TraffickCam.com in order to help AI help to identify where trafficked people are being kept, transferred, and photographed. They are both small yet significant steps on helping to heal the world and to slow down the terrifying rate of human trafficking, in hopes of eventually ending it altogether.

If you’re ever in Houston, stop by A 2nd Cup, a coffee shop dedicated to educate on and to help end human trafficking. As they say, they are more than a cafe – they are coffee with a cause. And their coffee and teas are actually quite good to drink, too.

In addition to that, love. Please, love. Especially those who are the worst of company, show them mercy’s no show them love. If you cannot show your own love to these people, show them God’s love. The only way truly to heal our world and its many sadnesses and evils is with love. Let people know that they matter – they, too, are children of God, even if they have strayed from His path and will in their lives. It is likely a lack of love that led them astray in the first place. They, too, and they, especially, need love. So, I ask you, please, to love.

Dear God, help us to love, please. Give us the courage we need to help heal the world through your love. In your name, we pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

A question:

When did I stop mattering? Or, rather, when did I stop being good enough? Worth it?

It was, almost, easy for quite a while for me to take care of myself. For me to go to bed early to get enough sleep, to wake up early with my natural body rhythm, to exercise greatly, to feed myself very nutritious foods almost always… to take true care of myself. It took little mental effort for so long…

Then something changed.

I don’t know what specifics it was or when, but something big changed inside. Something snapped for me. I have a feeling it was in August when the stuff went down with the gym… actually, yes, that was exactly it. (Haha. Duh. Already blocking it out, I guess! Better work on completing it instead, or I’ll be stuck in this cycle and state for even longer.) Yeah, that gym stuff really shat on me, for lack of better phrasing.

It’s interesting to see how subtle crap like that can have someone go from physically fit and strong, emotionally powerful, empowered, eager for life, and inspiring to a mere shadow of herself, both in terms of presence and in terms of the physical body. As I said to my mom the other day, referencing my being, my energetic space, “I keep getting smaller.” But the same could just as truly be said about my physical space. I’m down likely no body fat, but purely muscle loss of about ten pounds. I was already at nearly-prime physical fitness when I weighed 124lbs last year. The fact that I weigh 114 right now is starting to be a bit scary. Ten pounds is a massive change when one is only 124lbs to begin.

To add some extra context, when I was athletic in college, I weighed about 125-126. Later, when I was not doing great with my physical health and fitness, and I had gotten very sedentary (but never fat), I weighed 130lbs. Weight fluctuated between 128 and 130 on any given day for a few years. After a year at the gym, my muscle mass was way up and my fat was way down – yes, I did body scans for relative comparison over time – and my weight had only gone down about five pounds. So, in my prime physical fitness, I weighed about 124-125. That’s only a 5-6-pound difference from my heaviest. I’ve been in the same five-pound range my whole adult life. Now, in a matter of months, I am suddenly down ten pounds.

Not a great feeling in the mind.

I also have felt that I am, through allowing this struggle, torturing myself. And it hurts all the more that I can’t seem to figure out how to stop it, how to heal it for good. All efforts so far have been necessary, fear-based, and only meant to be temporary. I know they won’t solve anything, but I also know every little bit helps right now.

I think I might just want to sit with this tonight, sit with this sadness and the open-ended space for what I want to create for what’s next. Something is always next, and we always have a say in it. So, I will sit with this all tonight and see where it leads me for tomorrow’s considerations and inspirations.

Thank you, God, for this able-bodied brain and true logic. Help me to use them well, especially concerning my health and well-being. Help me to let go of the anger and the hurt and the need to fight back and attack and scream and yell at them for being so horrid to me. Help me to say to you what I seem to need to say and where I feel I need to be heard. Hear me, please, and help me to release and complete all of this pain and frustration I’ve been carrying around and by which I have somewhat literally been starving. And, if it be your will, please, teach those people not to be jerks – help them to see the light of you, so I don’t have to feel like punching them in the face anymore. That would be great, too. Thank you for a sense of humor. I appreciate when you make me laugh at absurdities. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. In your name, I pray. Amen.

P.S. If you want to pray for my healing and my completion with all those events last year, I would appreciate it and I welcome the loving prayers. 😉 Thank you, too.

Post-a-day 2023

What was the thinking here?

My man found himself this evening about seven and a half miles away from the road, on a beach where there had once been a highway that had washed out one too many times, the government had given up on it.

I imagine he was rough-housing it, playing in his SUV on the beach. However, he got far too close to the water, and that beach decided he was going to park it. And so, he was stranded on that beach.

At present, he has been stuck for over two hours, and we have confirmed that the tide is going out, not in, which he had originally thought was the case and which elicited much panic and stress from the both of us. In fact, the tide will continue to go out for another hour+, which is great news.

The guy who works on his car sometimes happens not only to be a specialist on his type of car, but also to be a big-time off-roader who has something like 15+ vehicles, several of which are big trucks. I’ve ridden in one of them, actually. This guy is on his way now to go get my man and his vehicle off the beach. Yippee!

Granted, it’s an hour and a half drive just to where the road ends, plus those extra seven and a half miles on the beach. Also, if my man had mentioned it to me sooner, the friend I asked would have immediately recommended the very guy who is now on his way to rescue my man, and the whole thing potentially could have been set into motion an hour or an hour and a half sooner, instead of at ten o’clock at night…

However, he is on the way and he is the right man for the job, so we are all grateful.

God, please, get both of them and their vehicles safely home tonight and in great condition, please. Please. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

Safe travels

Dear God, please, keep my man safe in his travels this weekend especially. Grant him the space he needs to release all that he has been carrying so heavily these past years. Help him to free himself willingly from the restraints that have kept him from being true to himself, true to the man You made him to be. Give him clear sight of who he wants to be, longs to be, was made to be, and grant him the tools and the endurance and the drive to become that man, always and forever. Thank you for the blessing of him. Help him to be ever more so the blessing Yoi long for him to be, both to the world and to himself. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

Being one’s best self

What does one do when one loves another and wants the best for that other person, yet one disagrees with that person as to what is best for that person’s health and well-being?

Really, I’d like to know…

I suppose the only true answer here is to pray – let go, and let God.

Okay, God, I give it up to you. I am terrified, and I give it up to you, nonetheless and all the more. I trust in you. Please, help us to see clearly and to pursue your will and your love. Help me to speak the words that need to be spoken, to say what needs to be heard. And help us both to hear what needs to be heard on all sides. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2023

Getting taller

We have finally worked out, it seems, a safe an effective way of having my neck stretched and releasing the somewhat compressed vertebrae in my neck and, even, upper and middle back. Golly, did that feel amazing when those three stretches released all those tight spots – just wow. I can tell that I still have a few more spots in that area, but we don’t want to shift too much too fast, so we’ll let it all set a bit over the next few days, and then reevaluate.

We have almost figured out how to release my lower back, just not quite. Several vertebrae did release down low, but the two that are kind of rotated toward each other did not release. I felt them get so close, I could almost feel the relief. Alas, they held on in the end. But this adjustment was loads closer to getting them back to place than we’ve had recently. God, of it be your will, please, allow my full spine to resettle into its best form soon, allowing me to pursue your will most effectively with my body fully intact and thriving. Help me, too, always to honor my body and, therefore, you and your creativity and creation. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Scratch my back?

One of the greatest parts of having a flatmate is the silly requests for help that are so easy and so acceptable. For example, ‘Could you use the trigger point gun on these muscles on my back that I can’t reach?’, ‘Could you scratch my back for me?’, ‘Would you help me do this stretch?’

Obviously, a lot of physical requests come to mind initially for me. However, they can be all sorts of requests, and they are all so easy and acceptable. I, for one, and so grateful for being able to help with and request help for them again. Tonight, my itchy back from the drying-out shower soap was grateful for the neighborly back scratch it got.

So, thank you, God, for such a fun and silly situation. I love you. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022