Tag: Japan

You’ve got mail

During the credits of the film “You’ve Got Mail”, there’s a song that comes on where a guy is singing about how he is going to sit right down and write himself a love letter, ‘and pretend it’s from you.’  I’ve been thinking about it since then, and I’m going to do just that for myself.  I don’t know who you are, exactly, but I believe you are out there somewhere, and, if we were together – meaning a pair, duo – now, you might send me this email/letter.

-—————————–

Hey, hon.

Just sending you a quick message.

First off, I love you.
Secondly, I miss you (Duh, of course I do.).  And, though we are almost literally worlds apart, I am okay, because you love me and care about me and are with me.
Thirdly, I love you.  Just so we’re clear.  😉  You have developed and changed so much these past few months, and I can hardly wait to get to know and to love all the new parts there are to you.  (I’m being somewhat sappy, I know, but I get to do that every so often, right? Right.)

(Now to the body paragraph(s).)

I hope you had a great day today.  We’re just getting started over here, and it’s a beautiful day.  How is your breathing?  Short, hot, and firey today, I presume, since it was a Monday.  Hopefully, you’ve stretched them out to long, slow, and deep by bedtime – I want you resting well while you are able to sleep, you know?  You’ve got to take care of yourself… keep your balance, now that you’re back standing again.

By the way, I think five minutes a day dedicated to your abdomen would get you the comfort you’re wanting for your beach-going.  You could do two and a half minutes just before sleeping, and another two and a half just after you wake up in the mornings.  That would give you a full five, and a significant improvement for that slightly-tubbier-than-usual belly of yours.  (We’ll be a rockin’ bods pair when you’re back here and we head beachside.)

Loving you with the sun and moon, babe,

~~~~

A philosopher for the moment

Today, I did some fun things including showing up my friend at children’s games, but I don’t feel like sharing about that right now.  I feel like being philosophical, ponderous… something like that.  And yet, here I lie with almost no thoughts, no words in mind or even on their way.  I am listening to the guitar upstairs, and what sounds like company sharing in the music for once (it is Saturday night, after all).  I am somewhat worried about the next couple months, specifically regarding how they will unfold.  I fear regrets, especially for after I have left this country, and am back living in my own.  I fear my being wonderful and amazingly successful in my endeavors once I’m back there.  I fear letting go of my endeavors in exchange for something safe.  I fear not becoming myself, not being myself once I am back there in a seemingly unchanged world as an incredibly changed person.  Someone told us to take a picture of ourselves before we begin this time in Japan.  I had forgotten to do that before leaving home, but I took a picture in the elevator on my way down to our very first meeting on my first day of orientation here.  I wonder what I will see different in my final photo as I say goodbye to this place.  I know that the two people in the photos are similar, however, they are in no way the same.  I loved and still do love who the former person was, and I do not want to become her again.  

These are things that are sitting in my being right now.  If you would have asked me before I wrote this, what I was thinking, I couldn’t have told you.  But now, as I have written this, I can see clearly that this is what was resting in my mind, in my heart, in my bones and flesh and breath… in fact, somewhat restricting my breath…, and that that is why I do not care to share the joys of today, but feel myself to be of a philosophical persuasion at present.  I could have lived with the greats right now.
Post-a-day 2017 

Note to self

I have this sticky note on my desk.  It’s not exactly positive, but it somehow encourages me.  I don’t remember when I wrote it, and I only somewhat remember writing it.  However, I mostly remember where I was mentally when I wrote it.

I was lost and depressed and stressed and unhappy, and I knew that I was going to stay in this current job to the end of my contract (this coming July).  I was concerned with my future, in terms of career, of who I want to be and the lifestyle I want to have, and in terms of potential partnership in my life (think “husband”).  And all I knew for sure was that my life was (and still is) here right now, in Japan and in this job.  There is something for me here for now.  When the something has been reached, I will move elsewhere, but not before then and not after then.  

And though I wrote this note months ago, it still applies and still rings true – it even gives me hope and inspiration for my future and my present both, despite its sounding so sad every time I hear myself read it in my head.  I think that I recall the pain that was present when I wrote the note, and I feel a connection, a sort of bond, with that person who wrote it.  I know that person was still I, but it was a different I from who I am now.  We still have that link of utter distaste in our mouths at being in this job and circumstance, though, and that is a powerful bond between us.  We work together through this bond to encourage one another to persevere – you can do it, and so can you.

It reads:

Also, bleib ich einfach

warte

“And so, I’ll just stay, wait”
And I do.
Post-a-day 2017

No!Drug!

I see various posters and signs and advertisements all over the place here regarding drugs (and even “drags”), and almost every single one seems to have something about it that portrays the idea of promoting, as opposed to opposing, drugs.  

The natural phrasing seems to be, “No, don’t do that.  Do this.”  And so, we have the natural adjustment in my brain of, “No!  Drug!” to, “No, don’t do that!  Do drugs!” or, “No, don’t do that!  Drug!”  (And then, is it meaning yourself or others?)

I know that I am silly.  This in no way changes that I am using legitimate logic here, and these posters are kind of hilarious.  😛
Post-a-day 2017

tuesday – tuesday – tuesday

Last night, I went to a dance social in Tokyo.  It was mostly friends and acquaintances, though plenty of other people I hadn’t known before the social last night.  However, they were all adults, which makes the following scenario worth telling (in my opinion, anyway).  As an important matter, know that I wore days-of-the-week underwear yesterday.  And, yes, they were for the correct current day of the week.

At the social, I happened to be wearing a pair of blue linen pants with a drawstring.  As such, they consistently slipped ever so slightly downward as I danced.  With my shirt being longer than the waistband of my pants, that normally would be no biggie.  However, seeing as this was west coast swing dancing, that means that my shirt regularly would get twisted or bunched up a bit, rising above the waist band of my pants for a couple or few seconds here and there.

Now, I normally am not opposed to such little glimpses of my midriff as my shirt-pants combination were displaying.  However, since my pants kept slipping downward, little by little, in combination with the shirt going upward now and then, this meant that the waistband of my underwear was also showing on a regular basis as I danced.  I guess I am not really opposed to this either, as they are nothing sultry, but I guess it is a bit of a social taboo when in certain company.  I digress…

I chuckled when I first noticed my peeping underwear waistband, because, do recall, I was wearing days-of-the-week underwear last night.  “See?” I thought, “I am just so dedicated to my job, that I am even teaching English after hours!”  For, every time my shirt went up, “Tuesday” was visible in clear block letters all the way around my hips.

I shared this thought with a few friends, and we all had a good laugh at the silliness of the situation – that I not only was wearing days-of-the-week underwear, but was unintentionally showing them off to everyone, and found a cute little joke around its happening.  One girlfriend commented, that it was a mighty fine and creative way to teach high schoolers English, removing clothing and showing the English off on parts of the body.  I replied how I could only imagine how much the boys would love learning English.  She then said that even she would be interested in seeing that lesson happen.  After all, who could resist such a unique lesson, boy or girl, man, woman, or +?  I know I’d want to see it, if something like that happened, because that’s just too ridiculous to pass up.  😛

 

Post-a-day 2017

Coincidental Acquaintances filling the Heart

I almost missed my trains home tonight, because I didn’t want to leave the people with whom I was.  I had only just met the majority of them tonight, and only passively, but I loved being with them.  You know the people who just seem to fill your heart, and make you wish for nothing but, perhaps, more time with them, for you are fully content in their presence?  That was my experience tonight.

I met these people at the dance event/social just a few hours ago, and only barely had the chance to talk with them during the social.  And yet, here I am, genuinely concerned (well, I was for a bit, anyway) that I might not make it home tonight, for I couldn’t seem to draw myself away from their presence as we stood outside the train station, just talking.  Well, we weren’t just talking, of course, but talking and laughing and joking and expressing joy and love with one another.  And that’s exactly the point, exactly the reason I felt myself magnetized to the little group of people who, except for the one couple, had only just met one another tonight.

It was beautiful, and has not left me wanting.  For now, for tonight, I am whole and complete, and utterly content, for I belonged with an ease I felt like I had forgotten, I was loved without hesitation, and my love was fully accepted.  🙂

❤ people who love
Post-a-day 2017

“I want so much more…”

Tonight, I saw in the cinema the newest version of “Beauty and the Beast”, the one with Emma Watson.  I have little I want to express about the movie itself here; I instead have a sentiment to share, which a particular scene evoked from within me.

As Belle made her hike up the hill, taking in the expanse of lands around her little town, I found myself crying as I mentally sang along with her words.  It simultaneously shocked me and seemed only natural.  Why on Earth would I be crying, when it isn’t even the sappy or sad parts of the film yet?  However, I fully understood my tears the second after I noticed them.

I can’t help but to feel that, with this almost-constant sense of anticipation and longing in my life, I know just how she feels, and down to the depths of my heart.  For whatever reason, I find a huge truth for my own life, expressed oddly perfectly through her words.

I want adventure in the great wide somewhere.
I want it more than I can tell.
And for once it might be grand
To have someone understand:
I want so much more than they’ve got planned.

Post-a-day 2017

Worldwide Shipping

Tomorrow, my life is scheduled to alter.  A friend is coming over late morning, we’ll run a couple or few errands together, taking good advantage of her car’s being here, and then our plan is to pack up everything I no longer need for my daily life, but that I want to keep in my life once I have moved back to the US.  To me, it is a sort of marker for the official beginning of the end; an end to which I look forward with great enthusiasm.

There are certainly many, many…, and let’s throw in another many things and people that I will miss from here.  However, so much of my life here consists of my job, which I very much dislike as a whole, and my solo city and apartment, of which I am not a fan (I really dislike being solo in life.  I’m fine with a solo apartment, so long as I have regular interaction (like daily, often multiple times a day) with people I love and who love me.  That, however, is not at all the case in my life here.).  Therefore, I am greatly looking forward to the end of this bit of my life.

In an odd way, I have felt as though I have taken a year out of my life.  As opposed to this having been a year of my life, it feels like a year out of my life, as though we could hit pause and go on brief tangents in life.  (Perhaps it’s more like changing the channel briefly, always knowing that the real show is on the original channel.  Something like that.)

So, I find myself delighted to be packing up tomorrow, getting ready to move forward.  It allows me to let go of the material objects, as well as the concern of how to move them into the next part/s of my life (Think plane trips with insane amounts of baggage – this is about ten times worse than that.), and focus my attention and mental space on the people and world around me that I want to love as much as possible while I am here.  It has been difficult for me to love at times while being here, and that, in and of itself, has been a powerful lesson for me in my life – learning to love when all I want to do is throw a fit at how terrible and unloving a situation is to me.  I want to do what I can to love this world around me, while I have the chance, and I know that tomorrow is a good step in having that happen.

And I’m terrified.  In a wonderful way, of course.

 

Post-a-day 2017

 

Math class in Japanese

Have you ever tried to do math in a written language you don’t know?  I have.  Forget about the part where you might have to wrack your brain, in order to recall certain mathematical formulas and rules from a decade or three ago.  What good does a formula do you, when you understand neither the givens nor the question?  Plus, how do you even find a formula, without knowing what you want to do (like what is being asked of you)?

I think we tend to be consice with our words in math problems in English a good amount of the time.  Sure, we have word problems, but the non-word problens usually are quite short on wordage.  For example, the following:

  • Find the following:
  • x = __  y – __ ∠A – __ lineAB – __
  • Given x = √7, find y.
  • Solve for b.

That sort of thing.  In Japanese, however, I’ve been unable to solve the problems, simply due to the fact that I can’t figure out what the problems are!  Usually, as soon as someone shows me what’s being asked on these Japanese math problems, I know the math to solve it.  However, the sheer magnitude (is that applicable here?) of words in the math problems throws me entirely to the sharks.  I’m usually quick with math, but I’ve never been slower than I am now with Japanese math.  Aargh!  😛  Haha  😀

 

P.S.  Just for reference, do recall that I am not actually in school as a student, but am a teacher.  And yes, it was normal for me as a teacher back in the US to join math classes.  Because I love it, really, and I can’t imagine life being quite so exciting as it is when I get to do fun math.  😛  I’m a total nerd, I am aware.  😀

 Give it a go!  These are even a bit easier than what I had in class. 😉

Post-a-day 2017