Tac-tac-tac-tac
Tac-tac-tac-tac
Swooo-Pop!
Owwww!
‘There you go.
‘It was your talus.
‘Should be good now.’
Ugh. I am certainly grateful, but stinking chiropractors, making my major worries the past weeks suddenly seem stupid. Just ugh.
Haha
Hopefully, I’ll be able to function fully again after another few days or so, though! Cautiously optimistic and looking forward to it!
Post-a-day 2021
I lie in my bed,
rubbing fingers gently up my head,
Comforting, pressing, calming…
They are putting me to sleep,
Just as they always seem to do
On the forehead of a dog.
Sometimes, I really do envy them,
Dogs…
I’ll take a back rub, belly rub, head rub,
Walk or run or roll in thr park
On any day
With the one(s) I lov
And who love me.
Perhaps all we really need on bad days
Really is a good pet
Post-a-day 2021
P.S. Happy Day One to Year Six! ❤ <3=""
Why must I be so volatile and cyclothymiac, even bipolar, when it comes to my work and to my self-image and, even, to men?
It’s getting to be a tad old school, and I’m quite tired of it, already.
Ugh…
God and Universe, please, help me to ease these extremes in my life, that I be able to create abundant love and joy through my being and doing in this life, sharing your love and joy as we create it together.
Amen.
P.S. I told a kid today how he was truly wonderful in the musical last weekend. I don’t know the kid – I just recognized him the other day in passing, and intended to tel him about the show, whenever I saw him again. I saw him this morning, possibly as I was handing out breakfast tacos to everyone, and told him then, surrounded by hungry teenagers awaiting their treats. I’m almost certain it made his day, considering the immense grin that resulted, along with his verbal thanks. When I saw him again tonight at a football game, a similar smile produced, with a touch of secret that, I realized, was with me – his gratitude extended even then, and seems likely to last. I am grateful that I was given the opportunity to do such a thing for another, and that I seized the opportunity well. Thank you, all.
Post-a-day 2021
It occurred to me this week that I most likely tend to take over conversations, constantly sharing about myself, because I feel those are the only times someone will listen…, Because I feel unheard in life… I feel no one is interested at any other time.
If I had someone who were interested, perhaps it would be easier not to take over conversations…
Just a thought.
Post-a-day 2021
Bro, I don’t quite understand where God is directing me right now, but I am certainly following the calls and encouragements full-heartedly. There is now a very high chance that I will be helping with this martial arts thing at school, now, in the mornings… because, you know, I wasn’t busy enough already. 😛 My words and thoughts, by the way, and I believe them as both true and ironic. Haha
Anyway, must sleep ASAP, as it’s already after 9pm!
Post-a-day 2021
Today, I had to give up being better than others. Instead, I had to acknowledge what was truly best for me and for my students. I need not be the one to put forth the effort regarding certain things in class, especially when it is specifically someone’s job to handle such things. I am paid to teach and asked to teach. When something else is preventing me from doing my job, it becomes my job to let the person know whose job it is to handle the problem.
And so, I did that today. I cried a bunch in that meeting, but I feel good about the whole situation now. I trust the person into whose hands I set the situation, and his words and approach and plans eased me, despite my initial aversion to reaching out for the support. And his casual comment about having been nearly three decades in the military somehow both surprised me and did not – “No wonder you are so calm,” I replied. His calm, calming, yet ruling demeanor makes sense with such context.
I have a high level of confidence that things will be much, much better going forward, and that I, much more so than up to this point, will be able to do my job and teach this one particular class. At last, we can begin to breathe and to have some fun.
Post-a-day 2021
Have you ever done something when you’re having loads of free time, and totally loved it, but then, tried it again, but without the free time, and been none-too-excited about it?
We just started up karate classes again after a month break. I have since started school, right? Now, more than ever, I am exhausted in the late evenings, getting into bed as early as possible, sometimes even at 6:40pm. Yet karate class is assisting the juniors at 6pm, and attending my own class at 7pm. If I attend the other classes throughout the week, they go even later. But I need loads of hours to move forward in my official training and belt levels (which I want to do).
So, I guess I need to sit down in the next few days, and figure out how many hours of what I need, and how quickly (or slowly) I can and want to make them all happen. Otherwise, without the specifics and the goals set up, I might get a little too tired to do any of it, especially with school happening right now. I do love this all. But I need to be rested enough to be able to enjoy it fully. Otherwise, the teacher and German within me will tear apart the instructors and assistants and other adults mentally, and be annoyed throughout all the classes for a plethora of reasons. I really don’t want to be that way. Alas, I shall make my plan and get some sleep!
Because I want to beast at karate. Seriously.
Post-a-day 2021
Precautionarily for the expected wind, rain, and flooding, school for today was moved to asynchronous learning yesterday afternoon. So, I sent out e-mails to my classes to let them know their assignments for today, and just checked in every so often to answer the few e-mails I received from them with questions. I did one make-up test at noon – which was fortunate to be digital, as the student had broken a finger, and so struggles to write right now -, but, otherwise, I rested much.
And boy did I need that rest.
The gym was closed for the morning classes, due to the intense rain and wind, so I didn’t even exercise today. (I suppose I exercised my freedom of choice by choosing to be restful.) I only had to be up just before eight to send out those e-mails. Though I woke naturally at four, my body let me use the bathroom quickly and then pass back out. I only awoke to my alarm after seven, telling me to send out e-mails. And then, I went back to sleep for another little bit, and resting in near-unconsciousness with eyes closed for an hour-ish before getting up for real for the day.
I dressed cozily, had some easy, warm food, listened to my current audiobook, and, after that test, went to go through paintings with my dad.
Today was oddly simple, yet very satisfying. I think the work I did was exponentially beneficial, and so was much more impactful than it would seem initially. Thank you, God, for such a blessing today.
Post-a-day 2021
Okay, but why??? Butt, why???
I’m about to go to bed, a touch late, and I have an early start tomorrow, despite its being a Saturday. Suddenly, my lower, lower guts begin to ache. My belly is swollen, 99% likely with gas. And then, even more suddenly, the area just upward/inside of my anus begins to hurt. The kind of hurt that make sitting sound near impossible. I’m moving slowly, now, and still have to all my stretches, and then lie down in bed… will I be able I handle it? Gosh, I hope so, because I am exhausted. And this whole situation is practically the epitome of my body telling me that it is exhausted. Naturally, that means it prevents me from helping it with more sleep…
Sometimes, nature seems like it dropped a few brain cells somewhere along the way… 😛
Post-a-day 2021
I genuinely do not know what to say. I am exhausted, and for many reasons. But today was oddly satisfying in many ways. Troubles from yesterday have not been handled. But much good was accomplished today for other parts of my life, and I feel really good about those things. I look forward gladly to applying some of the work I created today in classes tomorrow.
I love teaching…
Post-a-day 2021
hannah ananas 