Tag: goals

I wish…

I wish I could just go to Japan for a month to teach English again. I wish it were an option only for the alums of our program, so they know that we know what we’re doing and that we won’t need much support. It could be a way for schools to test out having an assistant language teacher with the program. Then, if they like it, they hire a full position. If they don’t, they only had to pay someone for a month.

And we get to revisit the country and culture and the work and students we so love and miss, but without having to commit forever or move fully.

Win-Win-Win situation right there.

Post-a-day 2022

Reading itch

I very distinctly had a desire today – a pull, more like – to read religious books, books that somehow use religion as a foundation for whatever they want to communicate… could be about building a relationship with God, about being a woman today of God, about Church itself, about prayer… whatever. But “Church books” is what came to mind specifically.

Guess I’ll start reading the book Church gave out the other week, then. It was meant to have a book study with it, and I even signed up online to be in a remote group (since I don’t live near that church), but I haven’t heard anything from that since signing up. Perhaps it is time for me just to start myself. If a group pops up later, I can still participate, even if I have already read the thing in its entirety.

Let’s do this.

Thank you, Life, for being a beautiful opportunity for me, and thank you, God, for joining us. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Dreams coming true yet?

My mom mentioned to me today something that she read just this past week about reaching for our dreams. The question she gave me was “If you woke up tomorrow, and your dream were fulfilled, what would be the first thing you would notice that told you that your dream had been fulfilled?“
I thought about this question. It somewhat baffled me, because I could not easily come up with an answer. Why is that? Well, if my current dream were fulfilled when I woke up tomorrow morning, I still would start my day the exact same way I do right now. I would get up early and go to the gym. I would exercise with delight and rigor. And then I would head to school. Only at this point would I have the noticeable sign, as the bag I had packed for school would be a bit different and where I showered would be different (at school versus at the gym).
While the exercise was interesting simply for the idea of what one thing would give it away, should my big dream come true, what was more fascinating and valuable to me was that my day would begin the exact same way. Put differently, I am already, in part, living my dream.
And that is quite cool.
Sure, I don’t have the specific work and finances and all the follow-up details and activities that come with those, but the person I am being, the habits I am pursuing… those are already exactly part of my dream life being fulfilled.
So, how do we level up now to the next step in fulfilling this dream? That is the question.
Post-a-day 2022
(Just a touch of hesitation now…)

Gymotions

I learned this morning that I need to go ahead and scale things down on Mondays at the gym. I needn’t feel like I am lame or cheating out or anything like that – I just simply cannot do the prescribed work. In the past, we had three levels of capability listed for each aspect of a workout. I was always the lowest originally, and eventually moved up to some of the middle level for parts of workouts. Now, we have only one, the hardest one. I am not on that level on any day. And, now, on Mondays, we are doing movements that are hard for my body period. I absolutely need to scale those down, and a lot. Otherwise, I will not improve and things will not go well for me. We can push when we are being lazy, but it is not a good idea to push when the body is crying with pains and high discomfort in movements. I needn’t cry doing any movements at the gym. But, today, I did, I was just so frustrated with not being able to do the stuff, no matter my effort.

Yeah, it was emotionally rough this morning. And my muscles were, of course, still quite sore going into it all, which didn’t help. At least I’m getting to bed a little earlier tonight…

Post-a-day 2022

Mass

Mass is such an emotional experience for me these days. When I am truly present, I end up in massive and intense tears… I wonder if it always will be this way, now that I am not so afraid to be myself as I am when I’m Church, in love and in need…

Thank you, God, for such passion and love as I have an feel from you when I am in Mass these days… may it continue beautifully. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Had to think about it still, but I got it right twice now!)

Soccer

I went to two soccer games tonight for school. I convinced two other teachers to go with me, with ease (surprisingly), and they brought another faculty member along, too. We were the faculty section at the game, and we were front and center. It was funny, but it was also extremely cold. We’re talking 8° Celsius with a feels like of 5 or 6°… it was miserably cold.

And yet, it was an absolutely wonderful experience. I loved watching the kids play, and though my toes hurt big time by the end, despite being wrapped in a sweater most of the games, it was all quite fulfilling for me, and I am extremely grateful. I have missed soccer.

At the end of the games, one particular student clasped hands with me in greeting. He hadn’t played due to an injury, and he was explaining this to me as he greeted me, clasping my hand. It was only a short few moments, but it was a small eternity of gratitude and love coming from him. Supporting these kids to be their best selves is one of the greatest things one can do to honor God’s love and creativity in this life, and I am extremely grateful that I have been granted the honor of doing just that. Thank you, God and Universe. Help me to share your love powerfully and effectively with the world through who and how I am this weekend. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

Show me how you work…

Alas, tomorrow, I will be back to judging young individuals on their fitness to be part of a very specific group. We shall see how things go this time ’round. Hopefully, it will go beautifully and smoothly, and we will find some outstanding folks to be part of it all and to bring some wonderful things to the table.

Helping make the world a better place over here, on an individual and global scale! Woohoo! Thank you, God and Universe, for this all. May we continue on such paths with my being your love in the world. In your name, I pray. Amen.

P.S. I can hardly contain my excitement about this soccer game Friday. I even have a tam shirt now to wear, and I am delighted! Ahh! ❤

Post-a-day 2022

(Got it twice now!)

Tuesday that felt like Thursday

I dreamt of what seemed to be being married and pregnant last night… I wasn’t openly sharing about it, but I felt pregnant in the dream, though I hadn’t shared it with any colleagues. And, what’s interesting, is that my colleagues were actually for the job I really want to have in real life. So, in an odd way, several hopes and dreams were realized in this odd dream – it was something of a first communion-type event for a Spanish-speaking community, though I only knew for sure one person at the event. But I was thinking about how I might want to do the event for my own child, completely in Spanish, too, but without warning people ahead of time. 😛 Because, clearly I am still myself in dreams(!). Haha

Anyway… there’s that. Also, I helped a few students with some research on their French project today, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. AND I ended up speaking in French with a friend before the workout this morning at the gym. That was both fun and fulfilling… surprisingly so, at that. I hadn’t realized how much of my current self was present in French. It was a cool discovery to make this morning. Guess I need to work on speaking French more often in my daily life. 😀

Post-a-day 2022

Dance, dance, dance…?

Man, I Really miss dancing. I miss the experience of simultaneously expressing myself to music while working with another, and of feeling undeniably beautiful and sexy, womanly… Dancing is awesome, and I miss it! And, especially now that I am so wonderfully fit – and that I am no longer afraid to be a woman, to be powerful, to be desirable and sexy, to be noticed and seen – I want to find my new self-expression in dance.

Man… (The idea of this all came up tonight, because one of, I dare say, the world’s top partner dancers is a sort of buddy of mine, and he reached out this weekend to check in with me. We only just talked tonight, and only for a bit, but it was a fun blast from the dance world, though neither of us has been part of it since the first shutdown in early 2020. I would love to dance with him… As it happens, dancing with him always had me feeling my sexiest, he so beautifully honors his partner whenever dancing. Even when I felt un-womanly and not beautiful in general, I felt womanly and beautiful and desirable and wanted whenever dancing with him. [And no, not in a creeper or weird way. Just to be clear here…] I wonder how it would be now, dancing with him, now that I already do feel beautiful and woman and sexy and desirable as a whole…)

Post-a-day 2022

(Just barely!)

Struggle day

I didn’t eat well and properly today, nor did I drink enough water, nor did I put together and take my supplements. (The supplements have been since Tuesday, which is quite a bad idea for me. So, I must put them together tomorrow and start taking them consistently again.) My head has been hurting a while now, and I feel kind of dreadful from it all. I napped midday for a few hours, though it was somewhat stressful sleep, in and out. Now, I am going to bed later than I had wanted, but this was, somehow, what I needed for today. God, please bless my sleep and my body that I awake rested and well tomorrow, ready and able to take on the day you have granted to me, that I might be your love in the world as I step forward into it all and embody your love and creativity through all that is this expression of me in this life. In your name, I pray. Amen.

Post-a-day 2022

(Barely got it!)