Tag: exhausted

Bedtime routine…

I wanted to go read, because I didn’t want to think about what to write…,

But then I thought about how I would be thinking all along in the back of my mind about things I could use for writing, as well as maintaining that semi-constant reminder that also resides back there to make sure I write before I go to bed…

And so I came and sat down on my magical handmade chair… thing – I think it’s possibly a stool, technically, and “magical” just felt right, because it is special to me, not because it is a regular Hermione Granger or anything of the sort – and picked up the little phone – “little” being totally relative, because it is definitely not Zoolander sized, but it also is loads smaller than the first many versions of phones, as well as the most recent iPad-type mobile phones – here to write something…

Apparently this is what I ended up writing for tonight – and “For Tonight” is the name of a musical that is about to have its world premier here in Houston(!)… 😛

Post-a-day 2019

Nerding into the finish line

Tonight was great.

I turned in the hard copy of my paper (digital copy was earlier today – I just couldn’t get to campus until after work), and then somewhat spontaneously went to dinner with a friend from college (finally, it worked out for both of us).

Dinner was great.

The restaurant we picked, which the friend had picked at random from the two options I gave, was shut down, and so we went to the other option, and the pumpkin red curry special was just what I’d needed and wanted on this cold and windy night.

I ran into an old friend from dance while having dinner, and that was fun.

The friend and I having dinner together talked a lot about boats, because he works with boats and art, and then we finished a crossword puzzle.

It was a nerdy affair, and I definitely loved it – a rather perfect end to the semester for me, really.

Post-a-day 2018

That paper…

So, that paper, the one that was due yesterday… I still haven’t written anything for it.

I have done extensive research for it, learned loads, and have ended up fully confident in my belief that the book’s history is absolutely absurd and somewhat hilarious (though it might not have been to those involved at the time), but I haven’t written a word of the actual 12-15-page paper that is due on it.

The thing is, I can’t figure out how to argue something about this book.

Sure, I could say its history is absurd, but is that actually acceptable, and do I actually want to look up the definition of “absurd”, and then develop how the book’s history lines up with it?

…

Maybe… not too bad of an idea, actually… huh.

Let me see if I can somehow compare it to something like a soap opera or telenovela, but more clever and better related to the book and time period…, then, I think I could make it all work out okay.

Ugh.

Other parts of my life just feel like s total mess, and having these papers makes it feel like I can’t address the real stuff in my life, and it just feels like I’m focusing on something stupid that pales in comparison to the rest of my life…, and I can’t seem to make it feel worth my real time, effort, and attention…

But I signed up for this program, and I am definitely capable of producing results…, so, I guess, let’s do it.

Then I can always look back at it as a face-palm sort of event in my life – one that totally improved me as a person, but really(?), that’s the route you picked, banana?(!!!???)

Yeah… exactly.

Post-a-day 2018

School

Three papers and presentations to go, but I finally have topics that are not only good topics, but topics that excite me… phew.

At last: something this semester that excites me about this degree.

And yes, I remember fully that I out myself in this program, of my own will and volition*.

*Is that being repetitive, or are they actually different meanings? (Aha – I looked it up, and I found that volition is the power or act of choosing and/or willing something.)

Post-a-day 2018

Cold…

It’s cold enough and I’m tired enough that I can’t seem to think about almost anything…  My eyes merely continue to close for increasingly long periods of time at every blink, and my mind keeps wondering why the air hasn’t turned on yet, since the temperature in here is well below the setting on the thermostat…  I guess we are kind of wimps here in Houston, when it comes to cold weather.  Yesterday and today actually did have cold weather.  It was in the single digits of Celsius (I totally don’t know cold weather in Fahrenheit, because I’ve never lived anywhere that uses Fahrenheit and that has consistent cold weather.), and the high was around 15 or 16 Celsius (16 is 61 in Fahrenheit – I know that conversion!).  However, our bodies still don’t take it well, especially when it actually is reasonably cold weather like yesterday.  I’ve already got a cold going from our sudden drop the other night (combined with my minimal sleep this week, of course), and I’m sitting under my sheets right now, shivering at the coldness of the room (it reads 69), wondering if I’ll be able to sleep if the heat doesn’t come on.  I only really set it to 71 or 72 right now, because it isn’t that cold outside.  But it’s set higher right now, just to test the system.  Sadly, as you can tell, the system is failing me right now.  And I’m really tired and want to sleep, but I already know that I will struggle with that, because my exposed skin – aka my face – will be so cold.

Oh, well… here’s to hoping for happy, warm, cozy rest tonight, and cool, crisp weather tomorrow (followed by a spectacular, long night tomorrow night, complete with sleeping in Saturday morning)!

Post-a-day 2018

Work

I’m not at a place to turn down a work-for-money opportunity, really, and so I’m going in tomorrow to work, though it wasn’t on the schedule until late this afternoon….

I usually love getting to go in to work, though – I genuinely enjoy it…

And the funny thing is that I’ve felt more and more down and out since I agreed to go in tomorrow…

… and I’m really not sure why…

Post-a-day 2018

Tears of fear and laughter

I was all set to write something good, using my computer…, but the internet is, yet again, not working properly, so I got pushed back to my phone for a short bit of thumb tapping instead (because I like two spaces after my periods in writing, and the phone application doesn’t allow such a thing).

Life can be tough and miserable, or it can be tough and comical… I think I’ll aim for the latter this week, since this small incident is one tiny straw on this bundle that feels like it’s breaking my camel’s back…

Post-a-day 2018

Life

The Universe gives us exactly what we need, exactly when we need it.

Period.

Today, I needed a reminder of the magic that abounds, and I was granted that reminder thoroughly and beautifully.

I was even declared an interpreter by someone who didn’t even know that languages are a prominent part of my life, nor that I know more than one language.

And, on my way home this evening, just to let myself free in having fun, I sang a free-flowing song in a language I don’t entirely understand (yet, anyway)…. and it, too, was magical.

Yes, today has been magical, magic-filled from the Universe.

Thank you

Post-a-day 2018

What happened today

I got out of bed at 3:45am, and met my friend outside at about 4:10am to drive to the airport.

I flew in an airplane to Chicago, where I met my cousins and then drove to Wisconsin.

We met with my brother and his friend at Devil’s Lake, and then hiked about six miles together around the lake.

We admired willingly the spectacular and deep-breathing-inspiring colors of the Fall, and awed at a Bald Eagle who flew over the lake for a bit.

We checked into our joined suite rooms, and then dunes down the street at an all-you-can-eat Mongolian stir-fry place, each eating more than we’d intended.

We gathered in the joined living area of the suite rooms, sipped digestifs, chatted about nonsense, played ukulele, practiced/learned some yoga and some acro-yoga, talked about nerd stuff, joked about my brother’s classmates back in college who argued about some terms in calculus, cracked up when my cousins began to argue about those terms in calculus, and consciously enjoyed our collective company.

I chatted more with my brother as he prepared for bed and I, unknowingly, was locked out of my room.

We laughed, and, eventually, I gained access back into my room with my cousins.

My cousin and I listened to voicemails from our grandparents, filled with wholesome delight.

I took the first good shower I’ve had in months (since the one where I’m living has been quite the nonsensical mess since I moved in there), and reminisced about Japanese onsen while I untangled a crazy knot in my extremely long hair.

I earned another badge in my Fitbit, because I walked over 22,000 steps today.

I stayed awake and in a good mood for over 19 hours.

I breathed easily almost the entire day, for the first time in a long while (it has felt, anyway).

I was myself, and so were the others, and we were spectacular.

I and we did good today, both grammatically correctly and incorrectly. 😉

Post-a-day 2018

Sing away the sickness

It feels as though an absence of music in my life is a sign of an absence of delight.

When there is so much happening, that I do not take the time for music – either listening or playing – it usually results that I am stressed and haggard and, quite likely, too, sick.

No surprise that I haven’t had any music lately, and I haven’t played guitar or ukulele in a while…., and no surprise that I’ve been stuck with an icky cold for over a week and a half…, because I’ve been so stressed and strained with various topics in my life, I haven’t taken the time to take care of myself.

I haven’t taken the time to have music, one of the deepest joys of my heart.

Perhaps, if I had music for myself every day, I might never get sick… there’s likely some study about that anyway, where music makes the body healthier (not to mention improved brain function on the whole).

Well, I’ve been doing what I consider to be a very good job, as of late, feeding myself and preparing food for myself…. now to add music in there every day.

I wonder if I can really do it… can I see myself as really being worth that effort and time?? (I’m still only halfway there with the good food preparation mentality…)

But I think it is a good time to give it a go, so I’ll go for it… music every day… for myself…, because I not only need but deserve it.

Okay.

…Crazy how this scares me somehow…

Post-a-day 2018